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Ryansamturner Posted 14 years ago
Grammar
Review of this sentence
Flapping my arms and kicking my legs, I hoped to keep afloat, but whatever I tried, I couldn’t stop myself from sinking.
Would you change anything in that sentence, structure wise?
Would you change anything in that sentence, structure wise?
Top answer
ryansamturner Flapping my arms and kicking my legs, I hoped to keep afloat, but whatever I tried, I couldn’t stop myself from sinking. Would you change anything in that sentence, structure wise? No.
- ryansamturner Flapping my arms and kicking my legs, I hoped to keep afloat, but whatever I tried, I couldn’t stop myself from sinking.
- Would you change anything in that sentence, structure wise?
- No.
- I would not change anything.
- (I didn't know anyone was writing the story of my life.
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3 Answers
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ryansamturnerFlapping my arms and kicking my legs, I hoped to keep afloat, but whatever I tried, I couldn’t stop myself from sinking.No. I would not change anything.
Would you change anything in that sentence, structure wise?
(I didn't know anyone was writing the story of my life.
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The sentence is okay grammatically, but the word "flapping" is a little questionable. "Flapping" generally implies free movement in the air, while the sentence describes an underwater situation. "Flailing" or "stroking wildly with" might be better here.
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