0
Sailsofoblivion Posted 12 years ago
Grammar
Punctuation?
I need to submit this piece tomorrow morning, and I was hoping if someone could tell me if its punctuation is correct or not.
Thanks in advance!
The Artists
The lovers of the moonlight are
Those who find solace when dusk falls,
While many of their kind find sleep,
And sunlight rests its weary eye.
They are free from earthly troubles,
As artists, condemned to create
Splendour that cannot be oppressed
Within the tomb that is this world.
Their craft is inspired by sorrow,
In a form timeworn and haunting,
As they create in silence, rare,
Amid the shadows of this world.
They were once forlorn in the light,
Until they allied in darkness,
To free their dreams from oppression
Within the tomb that is this world.
These lovers of the moonlight shall
Rest upon the break of dawn, when
The fire-eyed sun has awoken,
And sleep just like the silver moon.
While many of their kind awake
To find their hearts enwrought with woe,
And that all joy now eludes them
Within the tomb that is this world.
Thanks in advance!
The Artists
The lovers of the moonlight are
Those who find solace when dusk falls,
While many of their kind find sleep,
And sunlight rests its weary eye.
They are free from earthly troubles,
As artists, condemned to create
Splendour that cannot be oppressed
Within the tomb that is this world.
Their craft is inspired by sorrow,
In a form timeworn and haunting,
As they create in silence, rare,
Amid the shadows of this world.
They were once forlorn in the light,
Until they allied in darkness,
To free their dreams from oppression
Within the tomb that is this world.
These lovers of the moonlight shall
Rest upon the break of dawn, when
The fire-eyed sun has awoken,
And sleep just like the silver moon.
While many of their kind awake
To find their hearts enwrought with woe,
And that all joy now eludes them
Within the tomb that is this world.
Top answer
Your English is good here, although it's not an easy poem to follow due to its density. Punctuating such a piece isn't so easy, but here's my best offering, and some other notes. d The Artists The lovers of the moonlight are Those who find solace when dusk falls, While many of their kind find sleep <--- comma dropped And sunlight rests its weary eye.
- Your English is good here, although it's not an easy poem to follow due to its density.
- Punctuating such a piece isn't so easy, but here's my best offering, and some other notes.
- d The Artists The lovers of the moonlight are Those who find solace when dusk falls, While many of their kind find sleep <--- comma dropped And sunlight rests its weary eye.
- They are free from earthly troubles, As artists, condemned to create Splendour that cannot be oppressed Within the tomb that is this world.
- Their craft is inspired by sorrow, In a form timeworn and haunting, As they create in silence, rare , <--- obscure word, it could be heard as 'thin' silence, or that there are not many artists, probably the second was intended.
Get the Weekly English Kit 📬
New words, one handy idiom, and a 2-minute quiz — delivered to your inbox to keep your streak alive.
2 Answers
0
Your English is good here, although it's not an easy poem to follow due to its density. Punctuating such a piece isn't so easy, but here's my best offering, and some other notes. d
The Artists
The lovers of the moonlight are
Those who find solace when dusk falls,
While many of their kind find sleep &
The Artists
The lovers of the moonlight are
Those who find solace when dusk falls,
While many of their kind find sleep &
00
Thank you, your comments and suggestions have been very helpful! 
0
Related Questions