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Anonymous Posted 11 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Proofreading Paragraph

Can anyone please proofread this paragraph? Does this makes sense? My college teacher is checking for grammar/syntax/etc.

Religion is part of the social system. Religion shapes and reshapes culture.
I revised it because I am learning from the book that there is a humanistic and interpretive approach to “religion. Jesus Christ didn’t create Christianity. Buddha didn’t create Buddhism. Society created religion. Society wants to make the world understandable through symbols (beliefs, ideas, rituals, etc.). The symbols dictate how followers/society should act. For example, the Christian Cross motivates some followers to participate in self-denial because socially, self- denial is considered a virtue that leads to happiness. Also, religion is beyond worshiping a deity. Religion can be reading a newspaper every morning "religiously" or watching Sunday night football. They have become popular rituals. The rituals give meaning to society and to the individual. The Christian Cross use to be part of religion and now the symbol has become part of the culture (i.e. fashion).
  

Top answer

Religion is part of the social system. Religion shapes and reshapes culture. ) because I am learning from a book that there is a humanistic and interpretive approach to “ religion.

  • Religion is part of the social system.
  • Religion shapes and reshapes culture.
  • ) because I am learning from a book that there is a humanistic and interpretive approach to “ religion.
  • Jesus Christ didn’t create Christianity.
  • Buddha didn’t create Buddhism.
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5 Answers
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Religion is part of the social system. Religion shapes and reshapes culture.
I revised it (what do you mean by "it?" Your attitude towards religion?) because I am learning from a book that there is a humanistic and interpretive approach to religion. Jesus Christ didn’t create Christianity. Buddha didn’t create Buddhism. Society cre
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Yes. I revised my original definition of "religion".
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Can you or anyone proofread this also? I don't know how much I should post.

2. My definition represents the functionalist viewpoint. Religion as a system of beliefs, ideas, etc. (which is part of society), takes away the theological aspects of “religion”. Functionalists study religion scientifically, rationally and empirically. There’s no need to know the origin. A functionalist may ask
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Do not put a "/" mark in a formal essay. Say what you mean. Also, contractions should be avoided.

2. My definition represents the functionalist viewpoint. Religion as a system of beliefs, ideas, etc. (which is part of society), takes away the theological aspects of “religion”. Functionalists study religion scientifically, rationally and empirically. There’s no need to know the origin. A
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Thank you a lot for proofreading my essay. I truly appreciate it.

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