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Nekosama Posted 10 years ago
Letter Writing

Proofreading?

Hi Teachers,
Please help correct my letter if there are any mistakes. Thank you so much!

Dear Barbara,
You have asked me for my advice about your recent upset. In your letter you said that many students love to show off their luxurious products, like LV handbags and Rolex watches in your class. You feel very depressed and embarrassed because you could not afford any luxurious items.
Now, I will try my best to give you my opinions and some suggestions here.
People have different values and thoughts, considering their different growing environment and education they have received.
Luxurious products are not everything in this world. People can live without any one of these items.
As you know, there are thousands of starving children as our ages still struggling for a meal every day let alone buying regular products.
By comparison, you live a much better life than many people in the world. So, you don’t need to be jealous of your classmates. Perhaps, you have something which makes them envious as well.

From my point of view, knowledge is the most luxurious thing for students, so it is wise for you to draw more attention on your study.
I hope you will find these proposals useful and I am looking forward to hearing from you.
Yours,
Sara
  

Top answer

You have asked me for my advice about your recent upset. In your letter you said that many students love to show off their luxurious products, like LV handbags and Rolex watches, in your class. You feel very depressed and embarrassed because you cannot afford any luxury items.

  • You have asked me for my advice about your recent upset.
  • In your letter you said that many students love to show off their luxurious products, like LV handbags and Rolex watches, in your class.
  • You feel very depressed and embarrassed because you cannot afford any luxury items.
  • Here are my opinions and some suggestions.
  • People have different values according to their varied growing environments and the education they have received.
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2 Answers
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You have asked me for my advice about your recent upset. In your letter you said that many students love to show off their luxurious products, like LV handbags and Rolex watches, in your class. You feel very depressed and embarrassed because you cannot afford any luxury items. Here are my opinions and some suggestions.

People have different values accor

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