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Mohammad Ramezani Posted 10 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Proofreading

Please proofread my essay. Thank you very much in advanced.

“My education is a hindrance to the process of my learning” Explain this quote by Einstein. “The only thing that interfere with my leaning is my education”- Einstein. What does he mean by that? And do you think he is correct?

The modern technology and advances which have made society’s lifestyle better and improved the standards of living are mainly due to the huge and excellent innovations which scientists created a century ago. One of the famous ingenious researcher, Albert Einstein, had believed that all of his discoveries and state-of-the-art inventions were because of carrying out research in every field he liked. The education systems were used to stop the creativity as most of the initiative ideas seemed ludicrous at first which the universities or education institutions were less likely to focus on these insignificant ideas. I think what Einstein mentioned about the education system was correct in the past while today it has been improving considerably.

In the past, the education system was more teacher based and students should follow teacher’s instructions while nowadays tertiary institutions take more attention on independent research activities. For example, when Galileo, proposed that the earth orbits sun not the sun, all of his co-workers and especially the religious leaders contravened his idea and even put him in prison for several months.

On the other hand, universities and schools currently consider research as their prominent objective in their curriculum. There are enormous funds and budgets for research activities to address the issues of industries and develop the standards of living.

In conclusion it is justified to say that the education system is changed considerably compared to the past and it is hoped this trend will be continued the world over.
  

Top answer

You have not mentioned which education system you are discussing. This makes your text vague. You should make it clear whether you are discussing one, some in particular or, education systems around the world.

  • You have not mentioned which education system you are discussing.
  • This makes your text vague.
  • You should make it clear whether you are discussing one, some in particular or, education systems around the world.
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2 Answers
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You have not mentioned which education system you are discussing. This makes your text vague. You should make it clear whether you are discussing one, some in particular or, education systems around the world.
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I made several changes for you, and I also pose a few things for you to consider. I hope this helps you.

Modern technology and advances which have made society’s lifestyle better and improved the standards of living are due mainly to the huge, excellent innovations which scientists created a century ago. One of the most famous ingenious researchers, Albert Einstein, believed that all of h

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