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Mohammad Ramezani Posted 10 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Proofreading

Please proofread my essay. Thanks a lot.

Learning a new language at an early age is helpful for children. Is it more positive of their future aspect or have some adverse effects. Agree or disagree?

Globalization has made the modern human being lifestyle to follow the culture, beliefs and language of the most pioneer and advanced nations or developed countries. It is argued that learning a second language from childhood age brings with itself number of benefits. Learning a foreign language from the early age has lots of advantages which are outlined in the following paragraphs.

First of all, learning a foreign language, especially English which regards as the global language, will help children to be successful in their future life. According to the study carried out in one of the prestigious psychology institutions in UK, learning at least 1000 words from the early age can considerably promote children efficiency and boost their cognitive ability. Children, under the age of 11, can be immersed more and the statistics have proven that they can be fluent in the second language after 11 months while for adults it will take ages to be fluent in the second language.

Secondly, engaging in learning English can open doors to children and students as the majority of the resources like the Internet and books are written in English. It can boost the self-esteem resulting to be successful in other subject matters like mathematics. Moreover, the bilingual children can digest knowledge and new information more convenient than mono-linguists. This can help the future generations, to be successful in the global trade and can open doors of opportunities towards further studies in post-graduate degrees in the Western countries.

In conclusion, according to what analysed it is justified to say that encouraging children to immerse in learning a new language can boost their self-confidence which assist them in their future life. It is hoped learning English will be compulsory in every not-English speaker country to boost the level of their high-educated people for Western countries.
  

Top answer

Globalization has made the modern human being lifestyle (awkward) to follow the culture, beliefs and language of the most pioneer (Pioneer is a noun. ) and advanced nations or developed countries. It is argued that learning a second language from childhood age brings with itself number of benefits.

  • Globalization has made the modern human being lifestyle (awkward) to follow the culture, beliefs and language of the most pioneer (Pioneer is a noun.
  • ) and advanced nations or developed countries.
  • It is argued that learning a second language from childhood age brings with itself number of benefits.
  • Learning a foreign language from an early age has lots of advantages (You just said that in the previous sentence.
  • State your thesis in the first paragraph .
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3 Answers
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Globalization has made the modern human being lifestyle (awkward) to follow the culture, beliefs and language of the most pioneer (Pioneer is a noun. It does not fit here.) and advanced nations or developed countries. It is argued that learning a second language from childhood age brings with itself number of b
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Thanks for your comments. I have revised the highlighted words as follows and will appreciate if you provide me about the accuracy of the revised words:

Pioneer: deleted.
regards: regarded
children efficiency: children's efficiency
to be successful: It can boost children's self-esteem resulting in a success in other subject matter
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Mohammad Ramezanimore convenient: I do not have any idea.
You need an adverb here, not an adjective.

It can boost children's self-esteem resulting in their being successful in other subject matters ...

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