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DESCRIBE THE ENVIRONMENT IN WHICH YOU WERE RAISED AND TELL HOW IT SHAPED YOU.

By the time I entered high school, I was a confident, young lady that was looking towards the future with plans for college and a professional life. My strength and faith in my abilities stemmed from my unique upbringing. My parents immigrated from Damascus, Syria to the U.S. in the 90’s, in search for a prosperous future they could build for their children. At a young age, I was exposed to the Islamic faith and the unique, cultural influences my family practiced back in Syria. I became accustomed to praying five times a day, eating Mediterranean cuisine, and averting-my-eyes-but-slyly-peeking when a romantic scene played on The Little Mermaid. I was also taught to value my education, be humble, and work hard for whatever I wanted from life. Perhaps most importantly, my parents taught me to have pride for who I was. However, my culture and values soon began to dwindle when I enrolled in the public-school system.
Upon entering public elementary in the first grade, I was accepted effortlessly by the mass of children. It was only after advancing to the fifth grade did I start to notice a widening gap between my friends and I. Previously, I had taken my heritage with me to school through my Arabic lunch items, traditional clothing, and appreciation for education, consequently becoming a top student. However, I quickly became insistent on leaving those pieces of me behind and assimilating into the American lifestyle by packing PB&J’s, sporting Nike shorts, and imitating my friends’ personalities and “cool” low grades. I was simply trying to avoid snide remarks and side long glances directed at my differences, and not wanting to bring more attention to these differences, my voice would often be drowned out to the desires and opinions of those around me. It was not until many years later of constricting myself did I begin to realize that by adopting this new lifestyle, I was damaging the beautiful culture running through my veins.
It was not an epiphany, but a gradual awareness that led me back to the identity I sought so hard to compress. After deciding to wear the headscarf in public properly, I became to truly accept my Arab and Texan identity and surrounded myself with both cultures in every part of my life, such as food and style. The hijab allowed me to define myself clearly as a Syrian-American where previously, I was constantly jumping between the two identities and uncomfortable with my character. I had to let go of some, but the friends I did keep supported me and I was able to ignore the judgmental passes made towards my hijab. It became easier for me to voice my opinion in topics that I valued such as faith. I gained confidence in my heritage and understood the importance of equality and diversity. School not only became a fun learning environment, but it also served as a sanctuary from the divorce issues occurring in my home. I implemented the lessons I had learned early on and prospered in my education and life, exceeding goals I would have otherwise never met.