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Tuanpa Posted 20 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing
Private cars....., please review my essay
This is an IELTS essay. Please help me to improve it. Thank you !
According to recent reports, it seems to be that automobiles are responsible for many deaths and serious injuries each year. The primary purpose of this essay is to provide some solutions that encourage people using alternative transport instead of cars. In addition, it exposes several possible ways for the government in promoting public transport.
There are some advantages of using non-motorize transport and public transport system instead of using car. Firstly, it is convenient for traveler to find a parking place. Most of universities, colleges, companies and organizations need a large area for packing. If more students, workers use motorbike, the parking areas will be smaller. Secondly, traveling by bicycle or walking in short trip has positive impact on health. Scientists believe that a small exercise everyday benefits for physicality and mentality. Thirdly, the environmental problems will be reduced if non-motorize transport and public transport are more popular.
In order to improve and promote the public transport system, government needs to invest more and to administrate seriously. Increase number of buses to ensure that they are always available even in the rush hours when there are a high number of travelers. Besides, the service also needs to serve seriously to avoid the dissatisfaction of passengers, which may cause the failure of the plan. For example, all buses have to be on time. If for some reason that a person misses an important appointment cause by the delay of bus, he will probably not use it anymore.
In conclusion, if passengers can aware the benefits of using non-motorize, public transport instead of private automobiles and government has the suitable policies to promote the public transport system at the same time, I believe that there will be a significant reduction of car-related accidents in the near future.
According to recent reports, it seems to be that automobiles are responsible for many deaths and serious injuries each year. The primary purpose of this essay is to provide some solutions that encourage people using alternative transport instead of cars. In addition, it exposes several possible ways for the government in promoting public transport.
There are some advantages of using non-motorize transport and public transport system instead of using car. Firstly, it is convenient for traveler to find a parking place. Most of universities, colleges, companies and organizations need a large area for packing. If more students, workers use motorbike, the parking areas will be smaller. Secondly, traveling by bicycle or walking in short trip has positive impact on health. Scientists believe that a small exercise everyday benefits for physicality and mentality. Thirdly, the environmental problems will be reduced if non-motorize transport and public transport are more popular.
In order to improve and promote the public transport system, government needs to invest more and to administrate seriously. Increase number of buses to ensure that they are always available even in the rush hours when there are a high number of travelers. Besides, the service also needs to serve seriously to avoid the dissatisfaction of passengers, which may cause the failure of the plan. For example, all buses have to be on time. If for some reason that a person misses an important appointment cause by the delay of bus, he will probably not use it anymore.
In conclusion, if passengers can aware the benefits of using non-motorize, public transport instead of private automobiles and government has the suitable policies to promote the public transport system at the same time, I believe that there will be a significant reduction of car-related accidents in the near future.
Top answer
I checked but on grammar... According to recent reports, it seems that the cars are responsible for many deaths and serious injuries occuring each year. The primary purpose of this essay is to provide some solutions that would encourage people to use alternative transport instead of cars.
- I checked but on grammar...
- According to recent reports, it seems that the cars are responsible for many deaths and serious injuries occuring each year.
- The primary purpose of this essay is to provide some solutions that would encourage people to use alternative transport instead of cars.
- In addition, it exposes several possible ways for the government in promoting public transport.
- There are some advantages of using the non-motorise and public transport systems instead of using the car .
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2 Answers
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I checked but on grammar...
According to recent reports, it seems that the cars are responsible for many deaths and serious injuries occuring each year. The primary purpose of this essay is to provide some solutions that would encourage people to use alternative transpo
According to recent reports, it seems that the cars are responsible for many deaths and serious injuries occuring each year. The primary purpose of this essay is to provide some solutions that would encourage people to use alternative transpo
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thanks for the quick reply, this is the new version after correcting
According to recent reports, it seems that the cars are responsible for many deaths and serious injuries occuring each year. The primary purpose of this essay is to provide some solutions that would encourage people to use alternative transport instead of cars. In addition, it exposes several possible ways for the govern
According to recent reports, it seems that the cars are responsible for many deaths and serious injuries occuring each year. The primary purpose of this essay is to provide some solutions that would encourage people to use alternative transport instead of cars. In addition, it exposes several possible ways for the govern
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