0
Triquediqual Posted 19 years ago

Poem: Mysterious Mind

0Mysterious Mind02br
02br
00 That mind is abashed…. illogical, lost, but exultant,02br
00Mysteriously slithering, removed from reality,02br
00Sickening, every move acted wrong,02br
00Hoping to please, but oh no.02br
02br
00 Maybe not, hope may arise,02br
00A lost cause looks at hope, although blind,02br
00Envisions nothing, recoils as before, again,02br
00Hoping to please, but oh no.02br
02br
00 Why has this occurred, oh why?02br
00Will that mind ever learn? What to do02br
00When this occurs, What may happen?02br
00Hoping to please, but oh no.02br
02br
00 Behaving wrong, not behaving, acting,02br
00Hoping to please those who don’t care,02br
00Damaging oneself, hurting oneself,02br
00Hoping to please, but oh no.02br
02br
00 Should we aid these lost souls,02br
00Why should we? They are lost.02br
00Euphoric thoughts never exist,02br
00Hoping to please, but oh no.02br
02br
00 Wait! Maybe one-self can feel alike,02br
00Is this dislike required, these unrequited,02br
00Burnt stars, that cease existence, just maybe,02br
00These thoughts may cease, oh ecstasy returns for once.02br
00Triquediqual02br
00This is the first poem and first post on these forums, I have written many other poems that I will be posting on these forums to get opinion on them and general feedback on them. I welcome any comments good or bad that you may have also. I hope you nejoyed at and tried to think what the subject matter may be applied to.0-
  

Top answer

it fails to listen. It's a pattern,02br 02br 00that age old battle, as the mind sees02br 02br 00that the path that has been mapped out for02br 02br 00ages, the body will never stick to it. 02br 02br 00But the mind, it dreams, it creates,02br 02br 00and the passion it finds through mundane things02br 02br 00satisfies an angry thirst, triggering hope.

— Anonymous

  • it fails to listen.
  • It's a pattern,02br 02br 00that age old battle, as the mind sees02br 02br 00that the path that has been mapped out for02br 02br 00ages, the body will never stick to it.
  • 02br 02br 00But the mind, it dreams, it creates,02br 02br 00and the passion it finds through mundane things02br 02br 00satisfies an angry thirst, triggering hope.
  • for the body02br 02br 00it is only a tool, a tool which connects us02br 02br 00to this world.
  • 0-
Free · every Monday

Get the Weekly English Kit 📬

New words, one handy idiom, and a 2-minute quiz — delivered to your inbox to keep your streak alive.

10 Answers
0
0...just words triggered from reading ur poem.02br
02br
00Hope, there is no such thing,02br
02br
00it is but imagined to justify, to sculpt,02br
02br
00to save, and so it burns in your mind,02br
02br
00created in dispair,02br
02br
00ignited when the fire that kept you alive02br
02br
0
0
0Hi...!02br
02br
00U're Great...05000 How you can make it? I wanna be like you... i wanna make a long poem but i always fail. would you mind giving me some tips to make it ?02br
02br
051010id211id1
0
0
0I presume your not praising my poem.....050010id6
0
0
0Hi Triquediqual .. 05002br
02br
00Your poem is a really nice one.. It shows how sensitive u r! You have a vivid imagination... Keep up the good work! I love poetry.. n I, myself am a poet ..but a young one..05102br
02br
00Aelia010id111id4
0
0
0 its only a difference in opinion, T.....but your poem was inspiring.. 0-
0
0
0 I myself am young as well, only 17 years old, but love writing it.....Is this poem better because I'm so young, maybe age doesn't matter when writing poetry, it's the ideas, a young mind may produce young poetry that elderly people may never produce to the same extent.02br
02br
00Triquediqual0-
0
0
0Yes u are absolutely right! 050010id1
0
0
I disagree entirely on the point that young people produce young poems that older people are incapable of producing. I'm young as well, 16. When a young person writes a 'young poem' it is inspired by/deals with things that are important to a young person. An older person, having experienced these same things, would be equally capable of writing a 'young poem'. What might stop them is that their v
0
0
This was a fine piece of work, I'm qouting it for my college essay, thank you very much Emotion: smile
0
0
Absolutely beautiful !!!
0

Related Questions