Pls provide feedback on ielts essay

A healthy person is often described as someone who has a good diet, gets plenty of exercise and avoids stress.
What should people do to stay healthy in your country?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

You should write at least 250 words.

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A healthy man keeps healthy vision & thoughts. Therefore, a healthy individual maintains good diet, enough level of physical exercise and ignore stress. The country I live is developing country where people struggle and toil the hard work which leads to poor health. In subsequent explanations, I will produce the reason of poor health and methods to get rid of ill health.

Considering the reasons of poor health , shortcoming of financial support appears which leads to poor health of people. Not everyone is affluent and neither of them, get any monetary support from government. For example, the corona period has become one of the reason of loosing job and during lockdown , people has no hope for jobs. In this pandemic government does not support their people and left them with no food, no transport, no hospitals, no shelter.

The secondary reason appears of being uneducated. People are not educated and with the absence of education , those people are remain segregated from the useful information which is introduced in newspaper and brochures. This keeps away the people of right diet which is different for every individual. Similarly, they are not able to read health magazine which can help them to be healthy.

Particularly looking upon the way of being healthy person, money matter for needy person should be addressed by the government or the person should have some saving which can help them in emergency. Secondly, being uneducated is not a curse but yes still a literate person can help himself without depending on anyone. Moreover there are many methods are available to help uneducated people. For example, Social media is very strong and person with very basic education and help himself to read health information which may be help to gain health. In addition, the government’s services should be reached to people where it is needed especially poor citizens. These above-mentioned problems can help the oneself to improve his health and get rid of stress

In a nutshell , improving health and releasing stress in developing country is difficult but suggested approaches help the individual to maintain health

Time 10.44