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Vincent Ding Posted 20 years ago
Vocabulary
pls help with the expression of this idea
please kindly see the sentence below which i am thinking about:
Every soldier in the army shall abide by the Dress Code. In case of voilation thereof for the first time, one is given a warning; if he or she persist there, a penalty record will be entered in his or her file.
By "persist there", i mean "if he or she does not correct the fault". Is it fine in your eyes? if not, could you please help revise/improve the sentence.
thank you all.
Every soldier in the army shall abide by the Dress Code. In case of voilation thereof for the first time, one is given a warning; if he or she persist there, a penalty record will be entered in his or her file.
By "persist there", i mean "if he or she does not correct the fault". Is it fine in your eyes? if not, could you please help revise/improve the sentence.
thank you all.
Top answer
No, I'm sorry, "persist there" does not read correctly. Every soldier in the army shall abide by the dress code. ] being entered in the soldier's file.
- No, I'm sorry, "persist there" does not read correctly.
- Every soldier in the army shall abide by the dress code.
- ] being entered in the soldier's file.
- "
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3 Answers
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No, I'm sorry, "persist there" does not read correctly.
Every soldier in the army shall abide by the dress code. A soldier will receive a warning for a first violation; subsequent violations will result in a [penalty record?] being entered in the soldier's file.
But I'm not sure about this phrase "penalty record."
Every soldier in the army shall abide by the dress code. A soldier will receive a warning for a first violation; subsequent violations will result in a [penalty record?] being entered in the soldier's file.
But I'm not sure about this phrase "penalty record."
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