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Huongn04 Posted 6 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Please review this IELTS writing task 2 for me. Thank you

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.


There is no room for doubt that a rising attention to children's education are being debated nowadays. It is widely believed that parental guidance is the most effetive way to assist the young in the way of becoming responsible individuals in society, whereas others suggest that a large-scale educational environment such as schools does the job better. This essay will discuss both arguments and give out personal perspective.

On the one hand, it can't be denied that family's affect on children's growth is indispensably needed in every initial state of life. Parents obviously have the most opportunities to approach their children and profoundly influence their behaviors. Being taught by own consanguinities, juveniles will certainly have the ability to assimilate advices wholeheartedly due to homogenous genetic.

However, having said that, by facing the reality, it is reasonable to consider school is a more practical option. It can be easily seen that parents nowadays have the tendecy to be preoccupied with the hectic daily grind, which result in an unpreventable ignorance to their kids. On the other hand , school can be a wonderful replacement as it can provide a comprehensive educational system, including adjusting students' manners in a postive way. Adolescents will be able to integrate sufficiently by learning in an extensive environment while trying to adapt with their peers.

To conclude, despite a significant influence made by parents, I believe that it is school which can fully accomodate the need of educating youth generation in terms of well-behaving, especially in this bustling social./data/user/0/com.samsung.android.app.notes/files/clipdata/clipdata_200822_183941_544.sdoc->

  

Top answer

Huongn04 - I think you just look up synonyms in a dictionary and use them without understanding how they are used in natural English. This strategy will not give good results, and your writing will be unnatural, incomprehensible or ludicrous. You need to study words in context.

  • Huongn04 - I think you just look up synonyms in a dictionary and use them without understanding how they are used in natural English.
  • This strategy will not give good results, and your writing will be unnatural, incomprehensible or ludicrous.
  • You need to study words in context.
  • There is no room for doubt that a rising attention (unnatural phrase) to children's education are being debated nowadays.
  • (That is ungrammatical.
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1 Answers
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Huongn04 - I think you just look up synonyms in a dictionary and use them without understanding how they are used in natural English. This strategy will not give good results, and your writing will be unnatural, incomprehensible or ludicrous. You need to study words in context.



There is no room for doubt that a rising attention

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