Please review my writing task 2. Thank you.

Question

Some people believe that capital punishment should never be used. Others, however, argue that it should be allowed for the most serious crimes.Discuss both views and give your own opinion.My essay: It is argued that imposing the death penalty on any crime type is unnecessary, while the others believe that it is essential for the most severe crimes. I agree with the later because it would be an effective way to decrease the serious crime rate.On the one hand, some people argued that capital punishment should never be applied for the offender because anyone always has the opportunity to make a fresh start. The death sentence for the criminals can not change anything that they caused to the victims, so it seems to be useless. Instead of, life imprisonment could be considered so that the offenders could take advantage the rest of their life to compensate for their faults by working hard in prison. In some jails, for instance, the officials offer the prisoners jobs relating to farming like growing plants, which can create economic value for their countries.On the other hand, the most severe crimes should be sentenced to death penalty because it would be an useful solution to decline the rate of crime. The losses that the criminals caused for the victims and their family cannot compensate at any cost. As the result, to minimize the danger for other victims and alert the other criminals, the death penalty should be imposed. In Viet Nam, for example, the homicide rate was high in the past, but after implementing this punishment in the most serious cases, the number of these decreased significantly up to the present.In conclusion, although many people think that applying death sentence is not allowed regardless of the severity of the crime, I believe that it is crucial to make the society become safer.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Huy?n Phan Th? H?ngIt is argued that imposing the death penalty on any crime type

Penalties are imposed on people.

Huy?n Phan Th? H?ngapplied for the offender

applied to.

Huy?n Phan Th? H?ngbecause anyone always has the opportunity to make a fresh start.

That's an assumption which would not be true of serial sexual offenders, serial killers and the minority of people who have mental illnesses that make them dangerous.

It was also false in the case of the killer in the

2019 London Bridge stabbing

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2019_London_Bridge_stabbing He pretended to be rehabilitated.

Huy?n Phan Th? H?ngThe death sentence for the criminals

Remove the red part because you have not mentioned some criminals in particular.

Huy?n Phan Th? H?ngcan not change anything that they caused to the victims,

Using did would be more natural than caused. Using their would be more logical than the.

AlpheccaStars · Answer

Huy?n Phan Th? H?ng it would be an effective way to decrease the serious crime rate.

False.

In the US, there are 50 states. Some states have the death penalty, others do not. The ones with capital punishment have higher murder rates (by fairly large percentages) than those that have no capital punishment. They do have life sentences, where the most dangerous criminals are sent to prison until they die.

Read the data here:

https://deathpenaltyinfo.org/facts-and-research/murder-rates/murder-rate-of-death-penalty-states-compared-to-non-death-penalty-states

Anonymous · Answer

Huy?n Phan Th? H?ngInstead of, life imprisonment could be considered

Delete the second word.

Huy?n Phan Th? H?ngso that ~~the~~ offenders

Delete "the". That's because you have not referred to any particular offenders.

Huy?n Phan Th? H?ngcould take advantage the rest of their life to compensate for their faults by working hard in prison.

You need to add of between the words in yellow.

Huy?n Phan Th? H?ngOn the other hand, the most severe crimes should be sentenced to death penalty

You need to replace "crimes" with criminals. You also need to replace "to death penalty" with to the death penalty.

Huy?n Phan Th? H?ngan useful solution to decline the rate of crime.

You need to use a instead of an. Your use of "decline" is strange. It would be more natural to replace it with reduce.

AlpheccaStars · Answer

It is argued that imposing the death penalty ~~on any~~ for the most serious crimes ~~type~~ is unnecessary, while ~~the~~ others believe that it is essential ~~for the most severe crimes~~. I agree with them ~~later~~ (wrong word. Later is opposite of earlier. Also avoid "former" and "latter" because it causes the reader to go backwards. That ruins coherence and cohesion.) because it would be an effective way to decrease the serious crime rate.

On the one hand, some people argued (wrong tense) that capital punishment should never be ~~applied for the~~ given to an offender because anyone always has the opportunity to make a fresh start. (Actually, that is not the reason why people object to capital punishment. The reason is that it is cruel to kill someone by shooting , hanging or electrocuting them. It is much better just to put them in prison for the rest of their life. Besides, many murderers are judged guilty, and later on, they are found to be innocent. Do you think that innocent people should be killed? Here is one man who was convicted of murder and given the death penalty, but 23 years later was proved to be innocent. https://innocenceproject.org/cases/paul-house/ ) The death sentence for ~~the~~ criminals can not change anything that they ~~caused~~ did to the victims, so it seems to be useless. Instead of, (wrong word) life imprisonment could be considered so that the offenders could take advantage the rest of their life to compensate for their faults by working hard in prison. In some jails, for instance, the officials offer the prisoners jobs relating to farming like growing plants, which can create economic value for their countries.

On the other hand, the people who commit the most severe crimes (We do not kill crimes!) should be sentenced to death penalty because it would be an useful solution to ~~decline~~ (wrong word. Decline does not take an object.) lower / reduce the rate of crime. The losses that the criminals caused for the victims and their family cannot compensate (wrong verb form. You need the passive. at any cost. As the result, to minimize the danger for other victims and alert the other criminals, the death penalty should be imposed. In Viet Nam, for example, the homicide rate was high in the past, but after implementing this punishment in the most serious cases, the number of these decreased significantly ~~up to the present~~. (Vietnam is one of the worst countries in the world for executing people for non-violent crimes without any victims. Possessing a rather small amount of illegal drugs can result in a death sentence.. Global human rights groups severely criticize Vietnam for its horrible record of executions.) https://www.cnn.com/2022/05/27/asia/vietnam-death-penalty-amnesty-hnk-intl/index.html

In conclusion, although many people think that ~~applying~~ the death sentence should not be given ~~is not allowed~~ regardless of the severity of the crime, I believe that it is crucial to make the society become safer.

Please review my writing task 2. Thank you.

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