Please review my IELTS Writing task 2

Some people think that people who choose a job early and keep doing it are more likely to have a satisfying career life than those who frequently change jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

My essay:

The question whether keeping a stable job or switching jobs that gives more satisfaction has drawn much attention from the public. In my opinion, while some individuals tend to be job-hoppers, I would gravitate towards the idea that working stably in a job might be more fulfilled.

On the one hand, there are several merits to job hopping. Firstly, employees are possibly get a wide network of partners and colleagues. This helps them to get on well with every people in their organizations. Next, they could have potential to work for various areas of their specialities. For instance, some individuals who are knowledgeable would have more opportunities to put their knowledge gained from previous experiences into practice and they are ambitious to move up the career ladder. Besides, they dislike the steady job or desk job and therefore, looking for dynamic chances is definitely their greatest choice, especially the youth.

On the other hand, there are two dominant factors influencing the decisions of those who always tend to hold down the same job for a long time. First, this working style shows a sense of fulfillment. Furthermore, people working for a company in a long term probably stand a higher chance of promoting consideration. For example, they are absolutely entitled to receive a generous retirement package. It would be easier for them to take sick leave or enjoy holiday entitlement. In addition to getting a great pension scheme, people may feel a steady and comfortable life with job prospects and job satisfaction.

In conclusion, I believe that despite the excitement that changing jobs entails, whether for people trying their hands at different fields or for those with few ambitions, it is staying with the steady job that perhaps brings the career stability.