Please review my Ielts wring task 2

Topic: the tendency of human beings to copy each other is shown in the popularity of fashion in clothes and other consumer goods. Do you agree or disagree?

My essay:

Imitating one other is an innate human tendency. This trend has long been a controversial issue. Whilst some people believe that the tendency of copying other human is beneficial since it reduces the price for those who can't afford the original work to unreachable places, others claim that imitating one other is a lack of respect for the true artist labor and enable to damage to human life.

On the one hand, developing an original work is a time-consuming and effort process and it is acknowledged that it has a price costly. Copying enables people to create a cheaper version of the work and this increases its accessibility for everyone. For example, Mona Lisa, which was painted by Leonardo da Vinci in the 16th century, been copied by thousands of artists and this had enabled the common citizens to purchase an imitation of the masterpiece.

On the other hand, imitating others violates certain rights of the creator and harms to human life. It is generally accepted that this is a violation of patents and may lead to lawsuits at international courts by the tendency of copying other humans. In addition, imitation in consumer goods, especially medicines and food, directly impacts on the health of human being. In fact, there are hundreds of people hospitalized and even death due to drugs and food in imitating version.

To sum up, though it has violated rights of a few rich global companies, it has brought happiness to lives of millions of poor people. This tendency, however, needs to be monitored under strict regulation since excessive copying will prevent the talented individual from creating innovative product and these may slow down the march of human civilization.