Please review my IELTS Task 2 essay

Topic:

Computer technologies are more accessible and cheaper. As a result, more adults work at home and more children study at home.

Is this a positive or negative development?

My essay:

With the staggering development of computer technologies, working or studying from distance comes true. The debate about whether this development is positive or negative has been on for quite a while. Personally, I hold the perception that the merits of this development outweigh its defects.

The first perspective to make is that it provides opportunities for companies or schools to reduce daily spending. Expenditure on daily operation of firms and schools can be a huge figure, including utility bills, house rents, internet charges or such. More and more adults work at home and children study at home means there are fewer people at schools or companies with less requirements on schools’ and companies’ facilities, also means less costs normally. A successful example that it takes advantage of computer technologies is electronic business. E-business can control costs at a relatively low level principally because it totally works online, do not need entity.

There also is a prevalent belief that distance-working or distance-learning is conducive to saving time. People nowadays need to spend quite a bit of time on transportation, which not only causes time wasting, but also separates time into debris that is hard to fully use. It is no need to waste this time if distance-working is permitted. That also boosts work efficiency in a way.

Nevertheless, the lack of working or studying ambience at home might be an issue. Computer games or other temptations would distract people from working. Thus, working and studying from distance requires the excellent capability of self-discipline. Except for self-discipline, time limitation is another effective method to prevent from low work efficiency sometimes.

All in all, although distance-working or distance-learning has some imperceptible flaws, it is indeed a technology that will turn out to be in our favor in the not-too-distant future.