Please review my IELTS task 1

Question

The bar chart under illustrates four type of waste which are recycled by recycling center over a period of five years from 2011 to 2015.

Overall, the amount of four different waste fluctuated slightly over the period shown. While waste paper was the highest amount that recycling center collected, garden waste was collected almost only half the amount of waste paper.

In 2011, paper was the most collected type of waste, with 57 tons. Meanwhile, glass, tins were 48 tons and 35 tons respectively. Opposite to paper, garden waste was the lowest number, just only with 32 tons.

After hitting the lowest point in 2013 with 40 tons, paper waste rose to over 70 tons in 20115, which has the highest figure for all observed years. Meanwhile, the figures for the other type of waste all fluctuated throughout the period, with 52 tons glass, 39 tons tins and 35 tons garden waste in this year (2015)

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

I am not convinced that you have learned from your mistakes in the previous essays that I reviewed.
Why don't you fix the mistakes in those essays and repost them? We can see if you know what your errors are, and if you have learned to avoid making the same ones in the future.

Please read my advice for Task 1 essays. I see several errors in your writing that are pointed out in my posts.

IELTS TASK 1: Hints, Tips And Advice

Vocabulary Words For Task 1: Reference Post

Ðu´c Trâ`nThe bar chart under illustrates four type of waste which are recycled by recycling center over a period of five years from 2011 to 2015.

The bar chart under illustrates (wrong word. Read my advice) four type of waste which are recycled by recycling center over a period of five years from 2011 to 2015. (Incomplete - read my advice)

AlpheccaStars · Answer

The time-series clustered bar chart ~~under~~ ~~illustrates~~ gives / plots / compares / shows the amounts of four type of waste which ~~are~~ were processed / received ~~recycled~~ by a recycling center ~~over a period of five years~~ from 2011 to 2015. (What are the four types? )

Overall, the amount of four different waste fluctuated (wrong word - read my advice) slightly over the period shown. While waste paper was the highest amount that this recycling center collected, (That is not true for 2013. You need to be much more careful!) garden waste was collected almost only (unnatural) half the amount of waste paper. (That is not true for 2012.)

In 2011, paper was the most collected type of waste, with 57 tons. Meanwhile, glass, tins (Ungrammatical. missing conjunction) were 48 tons and 35 tons respectively. Opposite to paper, garden waste was the lowest number, (incorrect word. Waste is non-count. You cannot count waste.) just only with 32 tons.

After hitting the lowest point in 2013 with 40 tons, paper waste rose to over 70 tons in 20115, which has the highest figure (wrong word) for all observed years. Meanwhile, the figures (wrong word) for the other type of waste all fluctuated (wrong word) throughout the period, with 52 tons of glass, 39 tons of tins and 35 tons of garden waste in this year (2015)

Sample essay:

The time-series bar chart compares the amounts (in tons) of four different kinds of waste (paper, glass, tins and garden) processed by a recycling centre annually from 2011 to 2015.

Overall, the total tonnage collected increased from 172 tons in 2011 to 196 tons in 2015. In those two years, waste paper had the largest proportion of all four types, around one-third of the total, and leaves and trimmings from gardens the least, under one-fifth.

In detail, there was a decline in all types from 2011 to 2012. Notably, garden waste in 2012 was less than half that of 2011, 15 compared to 32 tons. The decrease in paper collected was less dramatic, going from 57 to 50 tons. But it continued to fall in the following year, 2013, amounting to 40 tons. From that low point, it went up by 75% over the next two years, ending at 70 tons. The year 2013 was an exception in that it was the only time when paper dipped to second place, below glass. The amounts of glass and tins varied within a relatively narrow range, between 41 and 52 tons for the former and 27 to 39 tons for the latter.

Note: This is a time-series bar chart because time is a primary dimension. It is also a clustered or grouped bar chart because the different categories are clustered at each time point.

Please review my IELTS task 1

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