Please review my IELTS essay. Thank you so much!

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary schools. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

It is believed by some professionals that encouraging teenagers to begin studying languages at primary school instead of secondary schools. Despite some obvious disadvantages of this trend, I would argue that these are outweighed by advantage.

On the one hand, there are major drawbacks to teaching a foreign language at primary school. Firstly, children might be confused between their mother tongue and the other language. Moreover, when a kid learns two different languages at the same time it might cause mistakes in pronunciation and vocabulary. Moreover, it means that they will be given an extra burden when approaching new things.

On the other hand, I believe that the benefits are more significant than such disadvantages. One reason for this view is that starting kids off with foreign languages early is that this increases the likelihood they will achieve fluency in adulthood. Obviously, a toddler learns new things very quickly so they can have a lasting memory of words and enhance their performance. For example, in Singapore, students are educated to learn English at an early age so they can speak and write it as if it were their mother tongue. In other words, learning languages also helps to improve overall cognitive abilities and benefit the development of a child’s brain.

In conclusion, it seem to me that the advantage of enabling students to study second language are more significant than the disadvantage as it leads to higher fluency and ?mpoved brain function clearly outweighs the flawed argument that it impairs uptake of nature languages.