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Mint Tea Posted 5 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Please review my IELTS essay. Thank you so much.

Some people argue that job satisfaction is more important than job security, while others believe that they cannot always expect job satisfaction, and a permanent job is more important. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

People have different views about whether job fulfillment or job security should be emphasized when choosing a job. While stability at work plays an important role, I consider feeling satisfied with employment should be given precedence over it.


On the one hand, job security brings employees many benefits. First, they can earn attractive salaries parallel to exclusive benefit packages. All of these things ensure a comfortable life for themselves and their families even if they retire. Moreover, nowadays, the job market can be defined as fierce competition. Specifically, with the workforce reduction in many firms annually, especially with the pressure COVID-19 pandemic on the economy and society, workers only prioritize how to keep away from unemployment instead of finding an ideal job.


On the other hand, it is justifiable for employees to change their job since they desire to find their real career passion which is integral to job satisfaction. First of all, a satisfied employee is not just a retained one but an ambassador for the company, internally and externally. In other words, the more they feel fulfilled with their work, the more they are willing to go the extra mile to achieve goals and dedicate their lives to the job. Furthermore, as the single activity occupying most people’s waking time, work also plays an important role in their health status. It is scientifically proven that long-term pressure or work strains can lead to a decrease in physical and mental health.


In conclusion, it is impossible to say whether job satisfaction or job security is more important since it is the goal of an individual. However, while having a permanent job is considerable, we should seek one that makes us feel motivated to dedicate for.

  

Top answer

People have different views about whether job fulfillment or job security should be emphasized the priority when choosing a job. While stability at work plays an important role, I consider feeling satisfied with one’s employment should be given precedence over it. [ 1] On the one hand, job security brings employees many benefits.

  • People have different views about whether job fulfillment or job security should be emphasized the priority when choosing a job.
  • While stability at work plays an important role, I consider feeling satisfied with one’s employment should be given precedence over it.
  • [ 1] On the one hand, job security brings employees many benefits.
  • First, they can earn a steady income, which [ 2] attractive salaries parallel to exclusive benefit packages.
  • All of these things ensur e s a comfortable stable life for themselves and their families even if when they retire.
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People have different views about whether job fulfillment or job security should be emphasized the priority when choosing a job. While stability at work plays an important role, I consider feeling satisfied with one’s employment should be given precedence over it.

[ 1]

On the one

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