Please review my IELTS essay. Thank you!

Some people think that sending criminals to prison is not an effective way to deal with them, and that education and training are better. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Opinions are divided whether a jail sentence is the optimal way to tackle crime or educational programs are better. From my perspective, prison is the most appropriate place to punish lawbreakers.

Granted, there are compelling reasons to say that education and training are beneficial to cope with the increase of people committing crime. This is predicated on the assumption that students are equipped with the adequate amount of knowledge about stringent regulations and are instructed to obey them at school. Having absorbed the consequences of offending laws, they probably avoid situations which may involve them as criminals or victims. For example, most youngsters are taught about traffic laws and road safety at their educational centers; therefore, they would drive more carefully and would try to dissuade their friends and family from traveling recklessly.

However, this line of reasoning is not sound due to the ignorance of many students at school. In fact, some of them might neglect the importance of laws and cannot be hindered when they persevere with carrying unlawful acts. In these cases, they must be imprisoned to ensure the safety of societies and suffering from difficult time in jail is likely to render them deterred and embedded with conscience for their illegal acts. For example, most juvenile offenders, who are susceptible, are repented during prison time because they are still young and have an insatiable desire to be released as soon as possible to reform their life. They do not want to spend their entire life in isolation and separation with their loved ones. Such a solution will help reformed criminals no longer be a potential threat for communities.

In conclusion, I am of the opinion that offenders should serve in jail term to be fully penalized because of their ignorance to law training.

I've tried a lot to improve CC and LR. Is it better? Thank you!