Please review my IELTS essay. Thank you!

Topic: Some believe that we should invent a new language for international communication. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

My essay:

Some people suggest that a new language be needed for global communication. From my perspective, the drawbacks outstrip the benefits.

Granted, there are conferring positive impacts derived from a new international language, the most important of which is that people from different countries can interact with each other without any exertion. It is not required to learn various languages to have a conversation with foreigners, which is beneficial since such a process is time-consuming and demands enormous efforts, especially with people who do not have a high level of proficiency in absorbing a new language. Moreover, another merit is for corporations which are attempting to expand their business worldwide. This is because they can easily communicate with consumers in many nations to examine the markets in order to capture their interest and manufacture appropriate products to each region. This is undoubtedly an effective method to boost multilateral trade among countries.

Despite these positives, I would argue that there are more negative impacts of a global language. One of them is the identity loss of cultures as dialect is regarded as a part of a nation’s culture. Take, for example, children, who are impressionable, might neglect their traditional languages to keep up-to-date with the trend of new language. Were this phenomenon to perpetuate without awareness of cultural heritages of the youths, one dialect could be completely abolished. Furthermore, the jobs related to translating would probably be affected. A good example is interpreters. Given that everyone can interact with a new language, they would have a tendency to lose their employment opportunities. Therefore, it leads to the fallout of an occupation.

In conclusion, although the invention of an international language has numerous advantages, I believe that these would pale in comparison with the disadvantages of identity loss and certain people’s job chances.