Please review my IELTS essay task 2

Topic: It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

My essay:

It is undeniable that not many people are born with talent. Although it is a tough challenge to specialize in anything without talent, I believe that every child can obtain high quality in their future careers such as sports professionals or musicians with good teaching methods and diligence.

Talented people apparently have more advantages in their interests than normal ones. They constantly have decent performances in their distinctive ways, which facilitates them to achieve success easily. Nevertheless, gifted people who have no willingness to practice or study more will not succeed in any certain occupation, especially in sport or music. For instance, Mario Ballotelli who is a talented footballer has wasted his time on drugs and parities instead of training, which impedes him from living up to a great level in his career.

On the other hand, normal children can reach the high quality of any aspects with passion, diligence, and good learning methods. Either in sport or music, which is evaluated as talented interests, has seen many hard-working professionals, who grew up with amazing teachers succeeded in their career. As an illustration, Christiano Ronaldo, a well-known footballer, is famous for his diligence and dedication in his whole career. As a child, he started his career in Sporting Lisbon Academy, which is a prominent football academy, then improved drastically under his sublime managers in different clubs and never stopped training and still now. Today, he is one of the most successful and wealthy sport professionals in the world. Hence, the combination of having good teachers and hard work will pay off.

To conclude, every person can be superb in their interests with dedication and learning from good teachers without talent. Furthermore, gifted people should combine their distinctive abilities and diligence to be successful in their careers.