Please review my IELTS essay

Topic:

Many people are travelling to other countries. Why? Is it a positive or negative development?

My essay:

,The globalization has facilitated overseas trips in contemporary society. This essay will elaborate on which attract people's interest in travelling abroad and personally, it is a positive development.

To commence with, the increasing demand for transborder traveling is attributed to several factors. Firstly, it satisfies human intrinsic quality of being curious about the outside world. Taking a foreign trips affords travelers wonderful opportunities to immerse themselves in alien culture, getting access to ingenious residents and trying unfamiliar cuisine. These experiences help people enrich their knowledge and have a more profound understanding outside of their homeland. Secondly, a number of people nowadays go abroad for their academic and professional pursuits. Indubitably, wealthy countries provide a superior standard of living and quality of education, which attracts numerous flocks of employees and students migrating to in search of more lucrative remuneration and high-quality learning facilities. Finally, an objective contributing factor to cross-border trips is the increased financial status as well as the development of international airlines. Recent decades has witnessed workers' wages climb. especially among the middle-class, enabling them to treat themselves with foreign trips which are unattainable in the past. This has been complemented with the availability of airports and the affordability of air tickets, spawning a golden age of transnational travel.

From my perspective, I do opine that the prevalence of international tourism exert both positive and negative impacts. Firstly, tourism plays an important role in raising the locals' living standard. Indubitably, the growth of foreign traveling lead to the increasing demand for restaurants, hotels, transportations and other social services, which engenders countless job opportunities for the inhabitants surrounding tourists destinations. such as workers in travel agencies, tour guides or taxi drivers. Therefore, the poverty and unemployment rates is decreased remarkably, contributing to the national socio-economic development. Nevertheless, the booming of international trips is detrimental to the environment. Million tons of carbon dioxide is emitted from airplanes and other vehicles used in tourism sector, deteriorating air quality and ,consequently, human well-being. Besides a number of tourist attraction and natural landscape has been spoilt by the tourists' irresponsibility of throwing rubbish indiscriminately.

In conclusion, people partake in overseas trip for either recreational, educational or professional purposes. In my opinion, this development brings about both benefits and drawbacks.