Please review my IELTS essay

Some people say taxes should be spent on health care. Other people say that there are more important priorities for taxpayers' money. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

People have different views about how taxes should be spent on medical care or other sectors such as education and transport infrastructure. This essay will analyze both points of view and explain why I believe that citizens will gain more benefits if the government allocates the money for other sectors which are beneficial for society’s development.

On the one hand, there are two main reasons why taxes should be given out to the medical system. To begin with, it can be an efficient way to increase the life expectancy for citizens. Government can invest money for medical facilities such as drugs or modern surgical equipment so that patients can be able to access medical treatment in favorable conditions. Additionally, taxpayer's money can be used to supply free medicines and health assistance for the poor. It is true that medical fees these days are costly, the poor patients cannot afford the treatment. Thus, from the government's support, more lives can be saved.

On the other hand, there are people who say that there are more urgent problems to be considered. Firstly, it is necessary for the government to improve the educational system and qualifications. For example, they can invest the tax budget to build schools, provide lectures with training courses or hire native teachers to teach the foreign language to enhance an educational and learning standard so that students are qualified in future jobs. A second point is that the government should spend money on enhancing transport infrastructure. It would be better if the government spent more tax budget on upgrading the road system in order to limit traffic congestion and accidents.

In conclusion, I believe that taxes should be invested in other sectors such as education or transport systems rather than health care services. This is because it would help to create a qualified workforce and improve traffic jams.