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Khanhchi1508 Posted 5 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Please review my IELTS essay

Task 2: International travel is becoming cheaper, and countries are opening their doors to more and more tourists. Do the advantages of increased tourism outweigh its disadvantages?

It is true that these days, traveling abroad is becoming affordable, and many countries are welcoming this trend by opening their doors to attract more tourists. In my opinion, while I accept that the development in tourism has various benefits, I still believe that some drawbacks that it brings need to take into consideration.

On the one hand, it is undeniable that tourism plays a crucial role in each country’s economy. In fact, many nations rely on this development to generate a variety of income and improve their quality of life. In addition, local people will have more job opportunities such as working at restaurants or hotels, hostels which help them to earn a good living and achieve their high living standards. Secondly, due to the development of tourism, each nation can bring their own culture all around the world. For example, many foreign travelers come to Vietnam to learn about the uniqueness of their habits and customs as well as experience new things; hence, this country will have various chances to advertise its image which leads to attracting more and more tourists.

On the one hand, I believe that there are still have some disadvantages owing to this trend. By becoming more inexpensive, people tend to travel more resulting in damaging the environment. In fact, nowadays there are still exist some unaware tourists discarding their trash inappropriately which leads to air and water pollution, and some vandals who act deliberately to destroy historical monuments. Secondly, in order to develop the facilities for tourism, various buildings and skyscrapers are being built, and this action may harm the natural habitats as well as local people residing nearby these constructions.

In conclusion, it is my belief that even though the development of international travel is important, these drawbacks it offers are also essential to concern about.

  

Top answer

It is true that these days , (Unnecessary verbosity. ) T raveling abroad is becoming affordable, and many countries are welcoming this trend by opening their doors to attract more tourists. In my opinion, while I accept that the development in tourism has various benefits, I still believe that some drawbacks that it brings make it a net negative development.

  • It is true that these days , (Unnecessary verbosity.
  • ) T raveling abroad is becoming affordable, and many countries are welcoming this trend by opening their doors to attract more tourists.
  • In my opinion, while I accept that the development in tourism has various benefits, I still believe that some drawbacks that it brings make it a net negative development.
  • need to take into consideration .
  • (You have to answer the essay prompt: Do the advantages of increased tourism outweigh its disadvantages?
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1 Answers
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It is true that these days, (Unnecessary verbosity. Would you write something that is false?) Traveling abroad is becoming affordable, and many countries are welcoming this trend by opening their doors to attract more tourists. In my opinion, while I accept that the development in tourism has various benefits, I still believe that some drawbacks that it brings

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