Please review my IELTS essay

Topic: Nowadays many pople choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

My essay:

Nowadays, it is true that many people would rather start up their own business than be a staff of a company or organisation. There are several factors leading to this trend, but being an entrepreneur brings about some drawbacks.

On the one hand, people may decide to be a start-up instead of employee because of two reasons. Firstly, setting up a business seems to offer more freedom than working for an organisation. Not only are entrepreneurs no longer controlled by bosses, but they also can have more flexible working schedule. For instance, instead of getting stucked about eight hours per day in a workplace, office workers are more likely to arrange their working time flexibly. Secondly, it is possibly easier to hold a company nowadays than the past, thanks to the convenience of the internet since it can provide a global market. Take Kylie Jenner as a typical example. At the age of 21, she becomes the youngest self-made billionaire mainly by saling her own-brand cosmetics online.

However, setting up a private business may generate several disadvantages. The main challenge of being self-employed is that there is less stability than working for a company or business. On top of that, people who are start-ups may gain no benefits such as pension or sick payment when they become older. Last but not least, there is a large amount of pressure when being self-employed. It is believed that self-employment involves total responsibility and hard work. Besides, financial difficulties may be considered great burden of running a company, to say the least.

In conclusion, there is a trend that people decide to be an entrepreneur instead of an employee. However, the tendency to hold a private business still generates several drawbacks.