0
Hunghong Posted 7 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Please review my IELTS essay

The line graph below shows the percentage of tourists to England who visited four different attractions in Brighton.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.


The line graph illustrates the proportion of visitors who arrived in four different attractions in Brington, England. It is clear that the figures for Art Gallery and Festival showed a downward trend while the figures for Pavilion and Pier experienced a drop over a period of 30 years. It is also noticeable that Festival was the most popular tourist destination that attracted the highest percentage of tourists in 1980, but Pavilion replaced this position from 1987 to 2010.

In 1980, Festival attracted the highest proportion of holidaymakers at 30 percent, followed by the figures for Art Gallery, Pavilion and Pier at 21, 23 and 10 percent respectively. Five years later, the percentage of Art Gallery’s visitors peaked at under 40 percent. In the meantime, the figure for Festival droped slightly whereas the figures for Pier and Pavilion witnessed a steady increase. In 1995, the proportion for Pavilion experienced a sharp growth to peak at under 50 percent while the figures for the other places decreased.

In 2010, the pecentage of tourists visiting Pavilion and Art Gallery witnessed a dramatic drop to 30 and under 10 percent respectively. In a meantime, the figure for Pier grew to about 21 percent while the figure for Festival remained relatively unchanged.

  

Top answer

Please attach an image of the graph you are writing about.

  • Please attach an image of the graph you are writing about.
Free · every Monday

Get the Weekly English Kit 📬

New words, one handy idiom, and a 2-minute quiz — delivered to your inbox to keep your streak alive.

2 Answers
0

Please attach an image of the graph you are writing about.

0

The paragraphs are not well formed.

Paragraph 1: Describe the figure given in the task in general terms. Do not describe the data.
Paragraph 2: Write three main observations. These are the most important features in the figure.
Paragraph 3 (optionally 4): Describe some of the details, and make comparisons.

Do not use unnecessary words. These do not give the reade

Related Questions