Please review my IELTS essay

Subject: Please review my IELTS essay
Topic: Competitiveness is considered to be a positive quality among people. How does competitiveness affect individuals? Is competitiveness a positive or negative qualities?

My essay:

Nowadays, competitiveness is claimed as a substantial positive quality among populace by related-specialists. By diverse ways competitiveness may influence on people nevertheless, I suppose it is a beneficial quality.

In the same way I also suppose, that is a beneficial quality by

It is clear that people are affected by competitiveness. Individuals who are competitive try to be first of all and this manner may cause dissatisfaction among them, especially when they are not able to cope with their opponents. In addition sometimes competitiveness provoke people to proceed any unethical doing against their rivals. By the way, competitiveness deter individuals from enjoying team working. In addition hardly are they able to experience the pleasure of being friend by others, why competitiveness could compel people to condone the other values of life.

On the other hand, competitiveness may lead people to success. First of all, competitiveness stimulate populaces to find themselves in a rivalry and make effort more to acquire the best situation. . In fact people who have competitiveness as an inherent trait, obligate themselves to progress and not to stay behind of their opponents. Take as an illustration, competitiveness among the students of a class, encourage them to try to overtake from each other during the learning. In addition competitive people always try to keep their readiness for every sudden contest. Indeed they have an organized plan and because of their habitual preparedness they obtain victory.

In conclusion, I could infer, competitiveness is a good quality among people and may persuade people to try to achieve success, although like many other qualities, it may effect on people by different ways.