PLease review my essay - wrtiting task 2

Topic : many countries want to improve the standard of living through economic development; however, other thinks the social value is lost as a result of economic development. To what extent do you think the advantages of economic development outweigh the disadvantages ?

The immense development of economy in recent years arises a contentious debate over the pros and cons of this aspect. It is argued that the economic growth promotes the social welfare of population, while another school of thought is that it triggers the side effects on the social value. In my following paragraph, both views will be discussed before forming conclusion.

On the one hand, it is worth mentioning that the social welfare of inhabitants has been improved noticeably since the incremental economy in terms of education, medicine and infrastructure. On the educational level, the policies of many countries support the free of charge tuition fee for young generation, which diminish parents' financial pressure. For instance, Germany’s government provides free school-based programs for those who engage in their education. In Addition, the innovation of medicine has been witnessed with more experiments are conducted, which lead to the new kind of products as well as proper medical techniques. As for infrastructure, a growing number of multi-stored buildings are constructed to tackle the overpopulation and road system has been enhanced to provide the convenient lifestyle.

On the contrary, whether the economy should be stimulated further has adversely affected to the social value. To start with, many cultural heritages are facing difficulty in keeping intact. Since cutting-edge technology come into existence, many handicrafts are being replaced. Furthermore, many customs are out of date to the young generation as a result of modernization. On the other hand, there are also environment-related problems which cause health’s deterioration. Most of developed countries indulge their investments in military, which includes concerns over army reinforcement and nuclear power. For instance, japan is encountered with many fatal areas as the destruction of radioactive.

In conclusion, I am more convinced by the view that economic growth is integral to the improvement of society. However, the investments of government need to be tightly-controlled which focus on the benefits of population.

Thanks for your advice in advance.