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Ayumi arisu Posted 6 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Please review my essay. I want to improve my English.

Many people believe that social networking sites have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?

Most people hold the view that websites where they interact socially with others have adverse ramifications for people and society. I completely agree with the premise as people do not only waste time on such sites, but also suffer from stress.


When people use social networking websites, they waste their precious time. Today, people of all ages use various websites, such as Facebook, Twitter and Instagram to interact with others, developing their social connections. They spend considerable time in chatting with others and share their feelings with them on these platforms without realizing that they are wasting time. In fact, children are more vulnerable than adults in using such sites. It is reported that secondary school students of Melbourne, for example, spend two hours per day on Twitter and We Chat. Thus, most of them struggle to maintain their grades at school.


Another reason of adverse impact of social websites is that their users tend to suffer from stress. When people use these sites to make new connections, they also share their emotions and daily routines with others, including their relatives and friends. Sometimes they also share their cheerful moments with others in order to show that they are happier than them. For instance, most people check-in on the Facebook whenever they visit expensive restaurants or upload their pictures when they travel to another country. By doing so, they make others jealous as people feel envy and thus, suffer from stress.


In conclusion, I totally agree with the view that social networking websites impact negatively on people and society. Not only people waste their time on using them, but also suffer from depression by looking at other people's status.

  

Top answer

Most people hold the view that websites where they (The people who have the opinion may not be the same as the users of these websites. ) registered users can interact socially with others have adverse ramifications for the users people and society. I completely agree with the premise as people do not only waste time on such sites, but also suffer from stress.

  • Most people hold the view that websites where they (The people who have the opinion may not be the same as the users of these websites.
  • ) registered users can interact socially with others have adverse ramifications for the users people and society.
  • I completely agree with the premise as people do not only waste time on such sites, but also suffer from stress.
  • When people use social networking websites, they waste their precious time.
  • Today, people of all ages use various websites, such as Facebook, Twitter and Instagram to interact with others, developing their social connections.
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3 Answers
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Most people hold the view that websites where they (The people who have the opinion may not be the same as the users of these websites. The pronoun reference is not applicable.) registered users can interact socially with others have adverse ramifications for the users people and

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ayumi arisuThey spend considerable time in chatting with others

Use 'on' or lose it instead of 'in'

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