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Danphuong Posted 5 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Please review my essay

Topic: In some countries young people have become richer, healthier and live longer, but they are less happy.

What are the causes? What can be done to address this situation?



My essay:

Thanks to advances in every aspect of life, young people in several nations nowadays are able to lead a healthy and luxurious life. However, for them, these elements seem not to be synonymous with happiness. There are several reasons as well as solutions for this.


First, young adults of the present day are affected by various exterior factors that contribute negatively to their levels of happiness. Indeed, when social media platforms dominate their world, young people can easily be bombarded with a host of instructions to a perfect life. This, however, with a counter-effect, renders them dissatisfied with their ordinary self image. For example, in a recent survey, most of the young girls in the United States have admitted that Instagram makes them feel insecure about their body. Besides, what results in an individual’s satisfaction with life is related to hectic work schedules. It is clearly observed that the young today is required to follow a nine-to-five routine with heavy assignments and deadlines, which spares them little time of relaxation. Consequently, they are likely to burn out and unhappiness is an inevitable aftermath.


Nevertheless, there are also numerous solutions to solve this issue. The first one should be carried out by the person themselves; they must be aware of how detrimental it is to pursue an ideal but vague life existing only on the Internet. Thus, they must learn to restrict the amount of time spent on these platforms, then concentrate on such valuable activities as enrolling in charity organizations or playing sports. In addition, companies and co-operations need to regard their employees’ mental health as top priority. For example, the manager should divide tasks equally among the members so that an enormous amount of workload should not be put on one’s shoulders. As long as the young can strike the work-life balance, it is feasible that they can also maintain happiness.


In conclusion, although young adults may be living healthily without much financial concern, there are still elements hindering happiness in their life, some of which stem from social media and their job’s requirements. Therefore, that people should reduce time invested on the virtual world and companies manage their employees’ workload may help address this problem.

  
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