Please review my English essay

Topic : The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019.

My essay:

The given line graphs illustrate how ownership of 3 housing equipments changed and number of hours per week doing household chores in a nation over a twenty-year period starting from 1920.

From an overall perspective, the proportion of electrical appliances witnessed an upward trend, which resulted in the fact that the amount of time spent doing housework plummeted over the given time.

In terms of the first 40 years, there was a surge to 90% of the figure for refrigerators which none of the people utilized at first. The trend was similar to that of both vacuum cleaner and washing machine, standing at 30%, 40% in 1920, respectively, the figures for those facilities accelerated to 70%. In contrast, the number of hours allocated for housework underwent a plunge over a half (at 20 hours in 1960) over the time frame.

The rest period of time saw a soar in the percentage of cooling machine and floor cleaner which reached a plateau at 100%. Whereas, that of washing machines dived by about 9% in 1980 then recovered and accelerated to approximately 75% in the last year of the period. Meanwhile, there was a dip of merely 5% in the amount of time spent doing domestic chores from 1960 to 1980 then it hovered around 15% after that.