Please review - IELTS writing task 2

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Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing (for example, through cellphone tracking and security cameras). In many cases, the people being monitored are unaware that this is happening.

Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

The range of uses the technology offers today is enormous. Using the technology, the people are being monitored, often unaware too. This essay will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of using technology to watch over people. This essay will also provide reasons on why disadvantages outweigh advantages.

The two main advantages of the people being monitored are safety and law evidence. Women and children will feel safer in an environment which is being monitored. The research shows about 92% women agreed that they feel safe if they are monitored. In addition, the data collected will serve as a crucial piece of evidence in the court of law. The fear of this may deter people from committing some of the gruesome crimes. These advantages may compel the security agencies and maybe even the government to think that monitoring is a good idea.

On the other hand, there are few very serious drawbacks of monitoring the people, especially unaware. One disadvantage is, the people may perceive this as invading their privacy. The people will not prefer their personal cellphone conversations being recorded. The other major drawback is on how the data collected is being handled. There are umpteen cases in the past which uphold data misuse more often than data used for a good cause. Therefore, the disadvantages like privacy invasion and data misuse are more concerning than a few advantages.

The technology today hands us a greater power than the people can handle. This essay discussed the advantages like safety and law evidence; it also discussed the disadvantages such as privacy invasion and collected data misuse. In my opinion, the disadvantages outweigh the advantages of monitoring the people, using technology.