Please review An Essay writing task 2 ielts.
SUBJECT:-
Some people believe that young people know about international pop and movies stars but know very less about famous people from the History in their own country. Why is this? How can more interest be created in young people to gain more knowledge about their own famous people from History.
Since the development of the entertain industry has improved, the number of fan follower of artists have increased. many of them believe that people are more inclined to international music and movie. Though, it has created the popularity gap between the international artist and the artist of home country. This essay looks the reasons and suggests the solution to make our young generation aware about the past Icons Ideals and the great perfectionist of history.
Being unaware about the perfectionist of music and movie of own country and became fan follower of the artists of country who resides far. There are some reasons which could be easily understood. First of all, the customary tradition are not valued by our people; reason being , migration takes place . For example, Globalization allows many people to earn more money and make their life more standard. This makes migrated person far from the customs it follows and accepts the culture they live in.
In addition to , the another reason is advertising of the music, the young generation find only to listen and they start follow it. Thus, the artist who lives far from us live in the young people' s heart.
Looking upon the issue, anyone can be disheartened therefore, its is necessary to resolve the concern by changing the method of practicing entertainment. Firstly, we should raise the features of our past Idols, Icons celebrities so that young people may also know. Secondly, we must advertise those as business ambassador and promote them in stories of our children for example an animated story, the king shivaji who ruled and fought against the cruels. This how we can our child inspired to follow them and the same in music and movies also.
In conclusion, the concern of forgetting the own artists and following the the artists of dreamland was the problem of keeping our self from the reality of the country you live. Therefore, Advertising is the better solution to make our young children aware.
Top answer
Your writing has a lot of mistakes. You need to study vocabulary and sentence structure. Also, much of your essay was not answering the topic question.
- Your writing has a lot of mistakes.
- You need to study vocabulary and sentence structure.
- Also, much of your essay was not answering the topic question.
- The topic was this: Young people idolize international movie stars and pop music.
- They do not honor the heroes of their own country's history such as military leaders, famous sportsmen, scientists or political leaders.
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Your writing has a lot of mistakes. You need to study vocabulary and sentence structure. Also, much of your essay was not answering the topic question. The topic was this: Young people idolize international movie stars and pop music. They do not honor the heroes of their own country's history such as military leaders, famous sportsmen, scientists or political leaders.
0could you help me to tell where i can learn those things. I don t have personal teacher in my area. so i completely depend on internet for learning . Please tell how can I?
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