Please read my essay and give me feedback

I'm a sophomore in the US fyi, but I've been posting my essay everywhere and not getting any responses! Its pretty long, close to 3 pages, but I really, really need someone to read it and offer me feedback. I was thinking about entering a creative nonfiction essay contest but now I'm not so sure. Would someone please take the time to read this through

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1dah36uX6uv1l9jHBCD5rujMCbjvnQmrQBGfESQCDQQw/edit?hl=en_US