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Mitsuo23 Posted 16 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Please proofread: 76 words.

Hi all,

I'm a translator for mobile applications such as those of iPhone and have a paragraph that I'd like to add on my business website, will you please make sure if it is making sense, especially the articles and plurals part?

"While the number of Android users in Japan remains 5th in the world (download the report) and the best season has not arrived yet, NTT DoCoMo, Japan's dominate cellular phone company, finally comes to play the 'catch-up' role, releasing its Android phone, Sony Ericsson's Xperia X10, on April 1, 2010. They had sold 100,000 units in its first 20 days and now DoCoMo forecasts Android attains 5 million cumulative sales by 2011, catching up to iPhone."

Thanks in advance,
M
  

Top answer

While the number of Android users in Japan remains 5th in the world (download the report) and the best season* has not arrived yet, NTT DoCoMo, Japan's dominate cellular phone company, finally has come in to play 'catch-up,' releasing its Android phone, the Sony Ericsson Xperia X10, on April 1st, 2010. The company sold 100,000 units in its first 20 days and now DoCoMo forecasts Android will attain 5 million in cumulative sales by 2011, catching up to iPhone. " "Best season" for what?

— Hmea1

  • While the number of Android users in Japan remains 5th in the world (download the report) and the best season* has not arrived yet, NTT DoCoMo, Japan's dominate cellular phone company, finally has come in to play 'catch-up,' releasing its Android phone, the Sony Ericsson Xperia X10, on April 1st, 2010.
  • The company sold 100,000 units in its first 20 days and now DoCoMo forecasts Android will attain 5 million in cumulative sales by 2011, catching up to iPhone.
  • " "Best season" for what?
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2 Answers
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While the number of Android users in Japan remains 5th in the world (download the report) and the best season* has not arrived yet, NTT DoCoMo, Japan's dominate cellular phone company, finally has come in to play 'catch-up,' releasing its Android phone, the Sony Ericsson Xperia X10, on April 1st, 2010. The company sold 100,000 units in its first 20 days and now DoCoMo forecasts Android will attai
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Thanks again.

What I tried to say by "best season" is, ... I'm not sure. I think I made that up from the expression " the best is yet to come" but it seems like it didn't work the way I expected. So, I just delated the line.

Thanks again!
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