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Kkki. Posted 17 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Please mind my presentation

Hello all.I hope you guys can help me to correct the grammatical errors.Thanks !!!
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Good afternoon Miss Wong, I’m KIKI .Today I would like to introduce a film called Slumdog Millionaire, which is a drama, romance and violence movie.
Two brothers called Salim and Jamal born in the slum of India. When they grew up, Salim was leave and followed the local gangsters in India.
In a valuable chance, Jamal plays the game show ”Who Wants To Be A Millionaire” with his complicated life story. He joined this show not because of the money, he just wanted to find her lover Latika. They were lost with each other when they were in a childhood. Nevertheless, he answered all question and won the prize. Eventually, Latika was rescued by Slaim and she found Jamal through the game show.
In this movie, my favorite character is Jamal. When he was young, his mother was left. But he could take good care of himself and didn’t follow his brother footstep. Both of you know it’s not an easy way for a child. Besides, he didn’t care what people think of him. He was determined to join the game show and don’t afraid the other guys ridicule on him because he comes form the slum. I think he’s brave.
I ‘m really enjoy this movie. It ’ s bring a possible message for us. In our life, maybe we will face problem, we need to fight them one by one, just like Jamal. Also, I have learnt something after watching this movie. In Slumdog Millionaire, we can see India is in a difficult situation. They don’t have enough food and water even cannot bath every single day. But in Hong Kong, there are many food for us to choose. Nowadays, when I’m eating, I always remind myself don’t waste any food. Because I understand child don’t have enough food to eat somewhere in the world.
After the presentation, I hope you have the same feeling with me about the movie. Thank you!_____________________________________________________________________________

  

Top answer

Hi there! Today, I would like to introduce you a film called Slumdog Millionaire, which is a mix of violence, drama and romance. It is about two brothers, called Salim and Jamal, born in the slum of India.

  • Hi there!
  • Today, I would like to introduce you a film called Slumdog Millionaire, which is a mix of violence, drama and romance.
  • It is about two brothers, called Salim and Jamal, born in the slum of India.
  • When they grew up, Salim left Jamal and followed the local gangsters.
  • Struck by opportunity, Jamal gets invited at a TV show, ”Who Wants To Be A Millionaire”.
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1 Answers
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Hi there!
I'll try to help you out a bit, so here are my suggestions in what concerns your piece of text:
(I changed more than some grammatical errors, trying to make it sound better to the listener

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