Please kindly review my IELTS Task 2 essay. Thank you!

Topic: Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

People hold different views about the best measure of lowering crime rates. While some people deem prolonging prison sentences to be the best option, I strongly believe that there are more promising approaches such as improving social welfare and enhancing the rehabilitation process of inmates.

On the one hand, there are certain advantages to extending prison sentences. Firstly, it would serve as a deterrent for future offenders. In specific, this solution will disseminate a fear of losing freedom among citizens as they would have to risk serving many years behind bars even for petty crimes such as robbery or vandalism. As a result, people would abandon their malevolent behavior since freedom is one of the most valuable privileges. Secondly, if the authorities imposed longer jail sentences on perpetrators, the offenders could have more time to reflect on their false beliefs. For example, many criminals in Vietnam had been converted into model citizens after contemplating in jails.

On the other hand, there are two alternative measures to tackle this problem. The first one is to enhance social welfare. People tend to disobey the laws when their basic needs are not satisfied. If this solution was applied, the problem of extreme poverty could be alleviated, which means that conviction rates could be significantly reduced. Another feasible approach is to concentrate on improving the quality of the rehabilitation process of inmates. In this way, governments will not only promote humanitarianism but also lower the rates of recidivism. For instance, according to statistics, Scandinavia is having the world’s lowest recidivism rates thanks to the implementation of this method.

In conclusion, although prolonging prison sentences could help reduce crime rates, I contend that improving social welfare and raising the quality of the rehabilitation process are better solutions.