Please help with my Writing task 2.

Thanks for going over my writing.

Here is the topic: Some children can learn more effectively by watching TV. Therefore, children should watch TV regularly both in school and at home. Do you agree or disagree?

People hold contradicting views over the issue of whether children can efficiently assimilate knowledge by spending time on watching television and whether watching television on a regular basis, both in school and at home, is recommended. I do not concur that children can gain more benefits from watching television nor should they do this regularly.

One of the obvious reasons for that is children carrying serious health risks from allocating much time on television. If the amount of time allowed to watch television is excessive, children will be likely to lead a sedentary lifestyle. As a result, they will fail to adopt a fitness regime which makes them more prone to obesity. A recent full-scale investigation into overweight children launched by American scientists indicates that the underlying cause of children being obese is their spending a great amount of time on television leading to their lack of doing regular exercises.

Another factor for the argument is the downfall of interpersonal communication that children might suffer from. Watching television requires children to stay in. This makes them fail to obtain a lot of real experience, master vital soft skills and broaden their network of relationships. For instance, children show a lack of interest in studying and participating in extracurricular activities when they find watching television a more pleasurable hobby.

In conclusion, children may have more than one form of studying, but it leaves me unconvinced that they should consider watching television an effective way to acquire knowledge and waste time on this activity.