Please help to review my IELTS writing test. Thank you so much! (02.06))

Task 1:

The bar chart presents the comparison regarding the rates of three types of companies which utilized media platform in their business desires from 2012 to 2016.

In general, despite of remarkable drops in 2015 over all the categories, both small and medium-sized companies witnessed upward trends, meanwhile large ones stayed static between 2012 and 2016. In addition, big companies are the most active and most consistent user of social media during the years.

In 2012, the proportion of small businesses using social network for business purposes was at around 28%, gradually increasing to 35% in the next 2 years, and peaking at approximately 50% in 2016. Medium businesses underwent the same pattern, commencing at 31%, rising significantly to around 49% in 2013 and 2014, and reaching a peak of 51% in the very final year. Moreover, both groups experienced the only fall to 30% in 2015 throughout the whole interval.

In terms of large businesses, in spite of the sole exception being a low of 52% in 2015, the percentage of these firms showed a quite plateau between 2012 and 2016, with a narrow range of fluctuation from 78% to about 80%.

Task 2:

When it comes to the question which place the outskirts of towns or modern cities people should choose to stay for the sake of their health, meanwhile some people are wholly in favor of the former, some hold an opposite view. From my perspective, I strongly advocate living in the countryside for several reasons.

To begin with, the countryside environment is more conducive to health because in this day and age, the quality of life in cities is becoming worse due to air pollution, water contamination and overpopulation. For example, gridlock - the main reason for severe air pollution is more prevalent in large towns, which makes city dwellers are at higher risk of respiratory and lung diseases. Not only the atmosphere but water supply is claimed to be contaminated fiercely there as a result of industrialization. By contrast, these problems hardly arise in rural areas because of more green spaces and the absence of traffic congestion. Accordingly, residents in remoted areas can enjoy extraordinarily pleasant surroundings. Furthermore, living costs in these places are absolutely inexpensive, which enables people to equip more home facilities and amenities. It, in turn, is beneficial to their mental condition and improves their longevity as well.

Apart from the aforementioned disadvantages from living in cities, city life still has its own benefits. There is generally a wide variety of health care systems with its high standards of medical machinery in mega cities. Therefore, patients have excellent treatment to get well quickly and easily accessible to hospitals in case of emergency.

In conclusion, advantages of accommodation in cities are overshadowed by favorable impacts on well-being of people in country lands. Hence, I do believe individuals are highly recommended to reside in such rural places.