Please help to review my IELTS writing test. Thank you so much! (01.23)

Task 1:

The plans illustrate how much a small theater made over between 2010 and 2012.

In general, this theater was expanded sideways in 2012, incorporating a new hall, restaurants and showers. In addition, most of the existing facilities were converted and relocated in the process apart from a café being wholly eliminated.

In 2010, entering the theater by its main door, the café was on the right, opposite to an admin office and a ticket office on the left of the entrance. 2 years later, this area was enlarged to the left side with the admin office being moved to the back and the ticket office being shifted to the bottom right corner where the café had been. Thereby, it made room for new restaurants.

In terms of the central part of it, meanwhile, the auditorium had been kept intact since 2010, other facilities in the area changed remarkably with the main stage being nearly doubled in size and reorganization of other rooms. The storage room and media room were transferred to the right side and left side of the main stage respectively, which could be accessed from a new hall. Finally, a new showers area was built next to the media.

Task 2:

In this day and age, sons and daughters mature enough to move out from their parents’ house seem to prefer still living with their parents in several nations. From my perspective, I strongly advocate this tendency for a number of specific reasons.

To begin with, it brings about not only economic advantages for the young but health benefits to their parents. Firstly, young adults will save much money in light of sharing accommodation with their parents, especially nowadays it becomes seemingly hard for them to make ends meet due to the constant increase of housing prices. For example, if they decide to live in different places, there will be numerous housing-related expenses incurred such as furniture, rental fees and so forth. Moreover, larger financial resources thanks to that allows these people to increase their investments. Secondly, elders are at high risk of hazardous diseases like heart attack. Surrounding closely by their family members, they are taken care of and have immediate support in case of emergency.

On the other hand, this choice of young people still has its own drawbacks. These humans are likely to be so dependent to their father and mother that they have little room for personal growth and autonomy. In particular, a report pointed out that 45% of male adults continuing to stay with their parents failed to cope with family problems after they are married. Though, this may be not the case if the young learn how to assert their independence and resourcefulness while living with the parents by sharing costs and managing personal affairs.

In conclusion, in spite of possible disadvantages caused, living with parents after graduation from high school or even taking up employment is beneficial to both the young and the old in economic and health aspects.