Please Help Review My IELTS Writing Task 2?

Some people claim that museums and art galleries are not needed today, because everyone can see historical objects or art works by computer. Do you agree or disagree?

A school of thought holds that establishments and places displaying artefacts and artworks are no longer necessary since seeing these historical objects is made frictionless by the Internet. I totally disagree with this as this can cause the loss of cultural peculiarities and negatively impact the tourism industry.

There are many reasons why I disagree with the belief that museums and art galleries are deemed unnecessary due to the access to computers. First, the elimination of art exhibitions may equate to the loss of some nations’ identities. Undoubtedly, museums and art galleries are places housing and protecting those historical objects, which are also an indispensable part of countries’ intangible cultural heritage. This means, were these areas to be removed, certain intrinsic values of a country’s culture and tradition could not be preserved and maintained for later generations. Corrosively, a country would unlikely retain its sense of identity.

Second, the removal of those art-related areas may exert a pernicious influence on the tourism industry. Undoubtedly, besides other aspects such as recreation and breathtaking sceneries, many tourists decide to travel to a country mainly because they may have a desire to learn about its culture and deepen their understanding of its history. Thus, visiting a national museum exhibiting artefacts and artworks, for example, is one of the ways that travelers - especially foreign history or art aficionados - often use to satisfy their needs. Conversely, if all art galleries were demolished and tourists had to resort to viewing classic paintings and drawings via online platforms, they would not have the drive to visit those countries. Consequently, this may act as a detriment to tourism.

In conclusion, I totally disagree with the abolition of museums and art exhibitions for certain reasons namely reduced levels of a country’s identity and the afflicted tourism industry.