Please help my grade my essay

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

More and more people tend to opt for self-employment instead of working for corporations. Several reasons contribute to this phenomenon, and there are some drawbacks of being self-employed too, which will be discussed in this essay.
Self employment is something that people reach to after completing their bachelor or master's degrees. For example, students who chose a business management degree tend to set up a business or a start up. Although there are certain advantages of setting up our own companies, the number of disadvantages outweighs the number of advantages. When a business is first set up, people put in a lot of investment to increase profits. However, a new business cannot reach greater heights when it has just started. A lot of factors have to be in place for a business to see profits. For example, people have to advertise their product so that it reaches commoners. It has to be made in a way that it attracts customers. Then, the effectiveness and the cost price comes into play. Something that is sold above the market price will not attract people to buy it. It has to have frequent offers and discounts to captivate customers into buying them.
When people start a business or organisation for the first time, there are certain things that they must know about the market they are selling to. Only experienced people in the field understand the nooks and crannies of business. As a result, first-time business owners can experience losses and may not understand what they are doing.
Therefore, the self-employed people must rather work in a company or organisation and understand the ethics, management and marketing skills in order to make their business a successful one.