Please help me with my writing task 2
Question: Studies suggest that many teenagers these days prefer socializing online to meeting one another in person. Why do you think this is the case? What measures could be taken to encourage teenagers to spend more time meeting one another in person?
My writing:
In this modern era, technology is an indispensable part of our lives, especially in this ongoing pandemic. We can not go outside to socialize with people in person, just stay at home for social distancing. Multiple teenagers nowadays likely fancy chatting online more than meeting their friends in person. The reason and the solution are mentioned below.
First of all, adolescents seem to be shy and embarrassed to get on with people as time passes. Moreover, they do not want to show their faces much or they need to use filters to take a perfect photo. They are not confident and assertive with their appearance; therefore, chatting and communicating online is an actual therapy for them. This thing is incredibly appropriate with lazy, shy people who do not want to hang out. Teenagers also feel that it is not fundamental to have face-to-face interaction, it is still fun and fascinating to socialize online. It seems like they just want to live with their stunning cover on social media, not their real appearance. In addition, it is easier for them to get in touch with people from all around the world by using Zoom, Google Meets, and they feel comfortable when doing that.
The possible solution for this matter is local authorities should provide more spaces like parks, museums, etc for the young to take part in. They should also encourage adolescents to go outside by organizing abundant clubs and competitions for them to participate in. The higher the prize is, the more young people join the contest. Furthermore, parents had better hang out with their kids every weekend, support and take care of them so teenagers will feel euphoric and more confident to express themselves.
In conclusion, to avert this problem, adults and society should give love to their children more and more by encouraging them to show their true colors.
*Please tell me the score of this essay in IELTS. Thank you so much!
Top answer
In this modern era, technology is an indispensable part of our lives, especially in this ongoing pandemic. ) Nearly all teenagers these days have a smart phone, laptop or ipad connected to the Internet, and they spend a lot of time on various social media websites. Over the past year, the pandemic has caused schools and public places to close.
- In this modern era, technology is an indispensable part of our lives, especially in this ongoing pandemic.
- ) Nearly all teenagers these days have a smart phone, laptop or ipad connected to the Internet, and they spend a lot of time on various social media websites.
- Over the past year, the pandemic has caused schools and public places to close.
- We can not go outside to socialize with people in person; we just stay at home for social distancing .
- ) likely fancy chatting online more than meeting their friends in person.
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In this modern era, technology is an indispensable part of our lives, especially in this ongoing pandemic. (That is not focused on the topic.) Nearly all teenagers these days have a smart phone, laptop or ipad connected to the Internet, and they spend a lot of time on various social media websites. Over the past year, the pandemic has caused s
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