Please help me with Ielts writing task 1 (bar chart)

Question

Title: The charts give information about two genres of TV programmes watched by men and women and four different age groups in Australia.

The charts give information about two genres of TV programmes watched by men and women and four different age groups in Australia.

The bar graphs illustrate the proportion of people watching two different kinds of TV programmes namely reality shows and game shows in Australia.

Looking at the charts, it is evident that women watched reality shows more than men did, but there was a reverse tendency in game shows. Out of the four different age groups examined, the percentage of people watching both types of shows by more than 45-year-old people registered the highest figure.

The proportion of females choosing the reality shows accounted for 70%, which doubled that of males. By contrast, the percentage of men opting for games shows was 2% higher than that of women.

The most significant proportion of people watching in two genres of programmes belonged to the more than 45-year-old group, at 70%. Similarly, the group of 16-24 years old also shared the same proportion in both kinds of shows at 50%. There was a disparity in the group of from 25 to 44 years old in term of two different types of programmes. The proportion of 25-34 -year-old and 35-44-year-old group watching reality shows higher than that watching game shows with 20% for the former and 25% for the latter.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

Please attach an image of what you are writing about. We cannot help you if we can't see the figure.

I repeat this from your last Task 1 post.

Hienneu98 · Answer

AlpheccaStars · Answer

The charts give information about two genres of TV programmes ("Give information" is very vague. Information abou programs could be the length, the age of the show, the day of the week or the time of day it aired, or many other things. Tell the reader exactly what the data is. And also tell us the units of measurement. ) watched by men and women and four different age groups in Australia. (What are the age groups?)

The bar graphs illustrate (wrong word. Illustrate means to make an image. ) the proportion of people watching two different kinds of TV programmes namely reality shows and game shows in Australia. (This is better, but it repeats much of the previous sentence. You still have not given the age groups.)

~~Looking at the charts, it is evident that~~ Overall, women watched reality shows more than men did, but there was a reverse tendency (wrong word) in game shows. Out of the four different age groups ~~examined~~, the percentage of people watching both types of shows ~~by more than 45-year-old people~~ had ~~registered~~ the highest ~~figure.~~ value for the oldest age group.

The proportion of females choosing the reality shows accounted for 70%, which was double ~~doubled~~ that of males. By contrast, the percentage of men viewing ~~opting for~~ games shows was 2% higher than that of women.

The ~~most significant~~ highest proportion of people watching in two (wrong word - both) genres of programmes was in ~~belonged to~~ the more than 45-year-old group, at 70%. Similarly, the group of 16-24 years old also shared the same proportion in both kinds of shows at 50%. There was a disparity in the group ~~of from~~ 25 to 44 years old in term (wrong form) of the two different types of programmes. The proportion of 25-34 -year-old and 35-44-year-old group watching reality shows was higher than that those watching game shows with 20% for the former and 25% for the latter.

Vocabulary note: figure

In scientific/math contexts, the word "figure" refers to a diagram, graph, or chart inserted into the text. Native speakers avoid "figure" to mean a data value in this context.

Please help me with Ielts writing task 1 (bar chart)

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