Please help me to review and score my essay

Topic: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Teachers should be paid according to how much their students learn.

Until now, schools continue to determine how much staff are paid. Some people say the pay for teachers should be based on the amount of knowledge their students acquire. Personally, I completely disagree with this view for the reason that it is impractical and unreasonable.

First of all, measuring knowledge that individuals acquire in classrooms is quite unrealistic. It is the fact that knowledge is not as same as other common kinds of commodities such as foods, electronic devices, and vehicles that can be exchanged for money. We can hardly calculate how much kilograms a mathematics lesson is. As a result, there is no measurement that schools’ administration can rely on to pay for their teachers.

Second, the amount of knowledge that students achieve in schools is affected by various factors, not only by their tutors. Each student has different capability of absorbing knowledge. Some students are good at mathematics while other ones are excellent in literature. Therefore, knowledge acquisition is partially dependent on learners themselves. Moreover, parents also play a significant role in success of their children in schools. Those students who receive efficient support from their family will have more chance to be succeeded in studying at school. Finally, curricula and learning conditions at schools might have great influences on students. In some developing countries like Vietnam, obsolete curricula and ramshackle studying environments would be still major obstacles to success of students at schools.

In conclusion, for all the reasons mentioned above, I believe that paying for teachers based on how much knowledge they give to their students is unfeasible.