Please help me to check my IELTS Task 2 writing

Thema: The only ways to improve road safety is to give much stricter punishments on driving offenses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Task:

To increase the road safety, some people think that much stricter punishments are the only way. In my opinion, I partially concur with such an idea, because it is just an one-sided thought.

In fact, it is undeniable to state that the traffic condition in our country is gradually worsening. There are many traffic accidents occurred everyday which cause heavy injuries or probably death. Many drivers do not understand thoroughly the traffic rules as they obtain driving licenses from fake tests given by some corrupted training centres. In a nation where motorbikes are among the most used means of transport, riders often violate the code when circulating on streets such as passing through the red light, or rushing into one-way paths to bypass their journeys. Drunk driving which is recognised as a crime in many countries is frequently seen on the daily basis. Therefore, harder regulations in line with stricter fines should be reinforced to all people so that every person must follow the rule when driving.

On the other hand, it is not able to attribute all traffic accidents to the carelessness of drivers. With an enormous population concentrated in a few megacities, the number of vehicles is drastically increasing every year. As a result, the urban infrastructure for circulation becomes overwhelmed. Even, public transport does not developed enough to meet citizens’ demand resulting in higher pressure on the current route system. Thus, it is necessary to ameliorate the quality of current roads, and the government should implement appropriate policies to limit the use of personal vehicles in the centre areas. Moreover, propaganda campaigns or traffic education programmes at school seem to be useful tools to reestablish the law of circulation.

Finally, when awaiting for modern highways or convenient metros, I believe that strict punishments remain an effective strategy to secure traffic safety in parallel with strengthening traffic education.