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Anonymous Posted 14 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing
Please help me, thank you very much
Hello there,
I want to apply for an internship with the U.S. Consulate General Bangkok City. However, the position is very competitive. I am currently an undergraduate student and my English is so terrible. So can someone please help me edit my essay!. CLOSING DATE FOR THIS LETTER IS AUGUST 08, 2012PLEASE HELPPPPPPPPPPP ME. PLZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ . THANK YOU VERY MUCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
"Write a Statement of Interest that describes why you seek an internship with the U.S. Consulate General Bangkok. Explain how the academic courses you have taken, and other personal experiences you have had, relate to the Intern Program. Describe any public speaking or MC'ing experience you have and tell us how familiar you are with the American Center's programs and services."
and this is my letter:
I am writing to express my interest in an internship position at the American Center (AC). I think AC has a professional working environment and this is an ideal place for me to practice my English. Moreover, with my ability and skills, I would help the center to accomplish their missions. I am very interested in American culture. Being an assistant in AC means that I could help others explore the American culture and this is my pleasure. In the AC, I would have a lot of chance to meet many people and help them to the best of my knowledge. Another important reason that motivated me to the AC is that the American have spent al lot of money for the AC to provide free quality services for the Thai people and as a native I think I should do something contribute to this center. When I was a high school student, as a monitor, I often hold English game such as hang a man or word quiz for my class. Sometimes, on my school annual day celebrations, I was appointed to speak in front of my whole school. At university, I have attended courses of presenting in English using projector. I have attended a course named " skills to hold events" by the Student Assistance Center of Bangkok City . So I think I could give some helpful ideas for the next events of the AC. On recent July, I had just attended a 3-day-seminar about leadership development. In this seminar, I was given useful knowledge about team-building, communication skills, problem identifying and solving, community services.
Exploring computer's applications is one of my interests.I am currently in charge of the IT Department of my university class. I think I have considerable computer skills. And I can help the AC promote their activities through Facebook, YouTube design power point slide, design poster and edit the center activities videos. I think these academic courses and personal skills above would help me a lot to assist the AC if I were hired. I accidentally know about this internship program. When I looked up for a part-time job, a friend send me an email about this internship. And I was so excited about this despite this internship is un-paid. So I go to the Website US consulate, Facebook and channel YouTube. Then I come to the AC headquater to read books, using the Internet, participating in an an English club's activity. I find out the AC's services are so good and I think this would be an idea environment for me to intern so I decided to apply for a position without no hesitation despite this internship is un-paid. I particularly interested in being an assistant the AC. With my personal skills and experiences, I think I would help the center's operation a lot. Moreover, responsibility is one of my best attribute. I am available for Interview at any time.
I look forward to hearing from you soon.
I want to apply for an internship with the U.S. Consulate General Bangkok City. However, the position is very competitive. I am currently an undergraduate student and my English is so terrible. So can someone please help me edit my essay!. CLOSING DATE FOR THIS LETTER IS AUGUST 08, 2012PLEASE HELPPPPPPPPPPP ME. PLZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ . THANK YOU VERY MUCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
"Write a Statement of Interest that describes why you seek an internship with the U.S. Consulate General Bangkok. Explain how the academic courses you have taken, and other personal experiences you have had, relate to the Intern Program. Describe any public speaking or MC'ing experience you have and tell us how familiar you are with the American Center's programs and services."
and this is my letter:
I am writing to express my interest in an internship position at the American Center (AC). I think AC has a professional working environment and this is an ideal place for me to practice my English. Moreover, with my ability and skills, I would help the center to accomplish their missions. I am very interested in American culture. Being an assistant in AC means that I could help others explore the American culture and this is my pleasure. In the AC, I would have a lot of chance to meet many people and help them to the best of my knowledge. Another important reason that motivated me to the AC is that the American have spent al lot of money for the AC to provide free quality services for the Thai people and as a native I think I should do something contribute to this center. When I was a high school student, as a monitor, I often hold English game such as hang a man or word quiz for my class. Sometimes, on my school annual day celebrations, I was appointed to speak in front of my whole school. At university, I have attended courses of presenting in English using projector. I have attended a course named " skills to hold events" by the Student Assistance Center of Bangkok City . So I think I could give some helpful ideas for the next events of the AC. On recent July, I had just attended a 3-day-seminar about leadership development. In this seminar, I was given useful knowledge about team-building, communication skills, problem identifying and solving, community services.
Exploring computer's applications is one of my interests.I am currently in charge of the IT Department of my university class. I think I have considerable computer skills. And I can help the AC promote their activities through Facebook, YouTube design power point slide, design poster and edit the center activities videos. I think these academic courses and personal skills above would help me a lot to assist the AC if I were hired. I accidentally know about this internship program. When I looked up for a part-time job, a friend send me an email about this internship. And I was so excited about this despite this internship is un-paid. So I go to the Website US consulate, Facebook and channel YouTube. Then I come to the AC headquater to read books, using the Internet, participating in an an English club's activity. I find out the AC's services are so good and I think this would be an idea environment for me to intern so I decided to apply for a position without no hesitation despite this internship is un-paid. I particularly interested in being an assistant the AC. With my personal skills and experiences, I think I would help the center's operation a lot. Moreover, responsibility is one of my best attribute. I am available for Interview at any time.
I look forward to hearing from you soon.
Top answer
It's not bad, actually. There are a few typos and misspellings and simple mistakes you can easily find, like "an idea environment" and "I particularly interested". I would give you an interview based on the level of English you display.
- It's not bad, actually.
- There are a few typos and misspellings and simple mistakes you can easily find, like "an idea environment" and "I particularly interested".
- I would give you an interview based on the level of English you display.
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2 Answers
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It's not bad, actually. There are a few typos and misspellings and simple mistakes you can easily find, like "an idea environment" and "I particularly interested". I would give you an interview based on the level of English you display.
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You have good writing skills but I guess you can make it better reconsider your letter of interest and unclude the following if you agree;
1: Your letter does not have as much unity and coherence as much required. So, please make it more unified and coherent and the following phrases would help you bring more unity and cohesion to your letter of interest;
1:Give your clear and c
1: Your letter does not have as much unity and coherence as much required. So, please make it more unified and coherent and the following phrases would help you bring more unity and cohesion to your letter of interest;
1:Give your clear and c
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