Please help me review my IELTS writing task 2.

Nowadays many people work part- or full-time from home. Some people say that working from home has many benefits while others disagree.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

My essay:

Working part-time or full-time from home becomes popular today and they believe that it has a lot of benefits. However, I think that working from home brings a lot disadvantages.

On the one hand, some people argue that there are many advantages to work part-time or full-time from home because it brings convenience and freedom for them. They could wear clothes make them comfortable and do whatever they want regardless of company’s regulations and choose any space in their house to work, which creates them a feeling of pleasure and promote them to work effectively. In addition, working at home give them a opportunity to get more close with their family and they also save the time for both distance from their house to their office and vice versa. In a retail business, for instance, to save the cost of properties and electricity, they encouraged their employees to work at home with a higher salary, after a quarter, most of their KPI goals achieved.

On the other hand, I believe that working from home do not have benefit because it is ineffective for businesses. First, people have many distractions like their children’s noises, which makes them less focused on their tasks and results in their poor performance. Second, it is more difficult to get support from their colleagues or their boss for challenging problems because they can not make a direct discussion. As my personal example, I used to work from home during the covid pandemic period, I faced a lot of difficulty to complete my tasks because my little sister often distracts me.

In conclusion, there are a lot of people working part-time or full-time from home today and they believe that it has a range of benefits, but I argue that it does not because it makes their job ineffective.