Please help me review my essay. Thank you very much

Topic: It is generally agreed that society benefits from the work of its members. Compare the contributions of artists to society with the contributions of scientists to society. Which type of contribution do you think is valued more by your society?

Art and science are two important pillars of the development of society. Some people argue that scientists contribute more to our society than artists do. From my perspective, both of them have great constructive impacts on humanity.

On the one hand, artists play a crucial role in the spiritual life of humankind. First and foremost, the art is appreciated as a form of communication of cultural value between different communities. Each year, millions of tourists come to visit historical sites, museums, and art galleries to discover the culture and history of other countries. Through artistic works, visitors can understand the thoughts, feelings, and operations of local people in normal daily life. Secondly, artworks can function as an effective therapy. In hospitals, listening to music helps patients recover more quickly, raise up their spirit, and reduce depression. Last but not least, art can act as a vehicle for social change. A large number of works of literature were produced to raise social awareness of various issues such as violence and inequality. Recently, “The Sorrow of War” novel that depicts the horror of the Vietnam War has been used to teach students about wars.

On the other hand, scientists have also made great contributions to our world. Unlike artists, scientists have made our life better by creating more materials. Until now, generations of scientists have created countless scientific inventions and innovations that enhance productivity and prosperity. The invention of light bulbs by Thomas Edison in the 19th century allowed people to be active at night that improves labor productivity. In addition, progress in science has made the world become safer. Discovery penicillin and other antibiotics help people have new weapons to fight against infectious diseases.

In my country, Vietnam, I appreciate scientists more than artists. The reason is that Vietnam is still a developing country that requires a lot of new technologies, modern machines, and scientific knowledge to produce more materials. Therefore, our priority is to have a stable society with adequate food and other necessities before concentrating on the development of spiritual life.